MAKING OF AN ART STAR

Laying low, making moves

2011-10-11T01:41:00.003-04:00

Hi honeys!

I've missed you! I know it's been seven months since I've blogged but don't worry, you know I'm always making moves even if you don't hear from me. That's exactly what I've been doing, making moves!

There are three events coming up, listed under "News & Exhibits" on my website. I'm also getting management together, as it's long overdue. Also hiring interns. Twitter following is growing, I've been meeting all kinds of interesting folks off of there. It's fantastic for networking, I'm so fascinated with it! lol Some big projects happening, lots of seeds being planted, others sprouting.

Basically what happened was, folks have continued to call me; hit me up for stuff to be in shows and interviews, but since I've been off the scene for a while things started piling up. I've noticed bloggers are helping keep my work relevant by still featuring and mentioning me in their blogs. I am so grateful to them for that. I can't even begin to tell you who has been contacting me for projects, what kind of projects they are, and the kinds of things I'm in the running for.

So realizing that I had to expand, I dropped everything I was doing and focused solely on building my team (aside from fulfilling current commissions, applying for grants, doing interviews, etc. lol). I realized if I kept going by myself, it would hinder my growth. So I had to literally stop what I was doing and put a call out for a manager and interns.

Things are really coming together honeys! I'm at a point in my career that I'm going straight for all that I've ever wanted - with no apologies. Simply because I'm tired of everyone's excuses of why it can't happen, but particularly tired of my own excuses. 2012 is going to be the biggest year of my career, I can feel it.

I just want to THANK YOU for all your love, support, and continued belief in me. The last year has been nothing but a road of restoration and healing. I've already named my next solo show "Critical Ascension" because that's exactly what it's been. Making work, building an arsenal of inventory to fulfill waiting list demand and create enough to put on a great solo show. Then my team and I will shop around for a venue to host it. It's gonna be the best show I've put on yet, so excited. But that's just a small fraction of what I have planned for us! You have no idea what's coming!

Well let me tell you honeys, y'all are in for a wild ride. Stick around, my team and I are making mad moves, is all I can say. You have no idea what we are about to do. Just BE READY. ;)

Conversation w/ Dad during dinner

2011-03-21T02:23:00.001-04:00

Me: "So what would you say is the secret to you and mom's marriage lasting so long?"

Dad: "We met when we were 13 playing ping-pong. We were getting ready for testing to get into college but were transported to be farmers during the Cultural... Revolution. Then we finally went to college but attended different colleges.

We got married at 31, had you, and I went to America for my graduate degree in Physics. Then you and mom came when you were 5.

The secret for us is that we faced a lot of adversity together in the last 50 years- Cultural Revolution when we were forced to farm and your maternal grandparents' house was ravaged, grandpa got arrested, it was a mess. Building a life in a foreign country, raising you, getting through cancer, bankruptcy, it hasn't been easy.

We're best friends. She's my BEST FRIEND. She's been there through all the hard times. No matter how bad my health gets or how broke I get, she'll be there.

We've grown together, having gone through so much and adapted to a lot- including being open minded to appreciate and believe in your crazy porn art enough to proudly show it to our Chinese friends!

Don't worry Yun there are nice guys out there. You have to find someone that encourages and supports your dreams, your best friend. Keep living good baby. Do what you need to do. I'll be so proud when Yao Ming buys one of your paintings, I hear he collects art? (Dad's obsessed with Yao Ming, lol).

I know you see her as Tigermom, but she's my best friend."

Me: *Bunny tear "If only she would just let up a little bit! I bet you that's how I ended up making this crazy porn art in the first place." Lol

Aw. I love my dad- big ears and all. Cuz he loves me and my crazy porn art. Now anybody know Yao Ming so I can make an old man proud?

Yeee... Gonna keep living good. ;)

Ready, set, GO! - Mastering my relationship to FEAR

2011-02-21T20:58:00.016-05:00

Hey y'all,

I am so freaking EXCITED! Things are coming together and adjusted in my digs. Ready to paint my Bunny behind off and create a new body of work. Targeted marketing plan in place; I may have to do a lot of the administrative grunt work myself to begin with but hopefully the team will naturally come together as I trust everything will fall into place. Whatever it takes!

Have to build a mass inventory of work and focus on selling direct to build some cash flow, but no matter what I absolutely refuse to go get a "real" job. Cuz you know what? Being a full-time artist is my "real" job. Anyone that doesn't understand that, just doesn't get it. There comes a point when you are just "all in" and I'm way beyond that point.

So if you don't see me for a good while, it's because I'm locked up in my make-shift studio looking at all kinds of porn working on new flowers, trees, cacti, mushrooms, etc. All that adversity I faced last year was necessary because it provided lots of inspiration and gave me plenty of material to paint about- human nature, society, my own viewpoints and experiences, all personified through the flowers. I am confident this will be my strongest work yet.

Gotta sell direct for now because although galleries are interested in my work, I still have to pay for shipping there and just don't have the money for wood, resin, and shipping yet. It's a lot of costs upfront. So meanwhile I'm gonna make a ton of work and sell it direct so I can get some money and go from there.

Man I am so grateful for adversity because it is the best motivator one could ever have. I used to let fear and adversity hinder and keep me catatonic, but now I feel like a space rocket, ready to launch into space as far as I can go.

I read somewhere that fear's purpose is to protect you from harm and not hinder you or give you stress; anxiety. The purpose of fear is to warn an animal of when to retreat- when sh*t comes, Bunnies are supposed to run away- that's it. I was telling a friend today that if we let fear hinder us and scare us into being catatonic, then we are imprisoning ourselves within our own imaginary walls.

I also read that when you feel fear but it motivates you; excites you; and you feel empowered, then you have truly mastered your relationship to fear. It took me almost three freaking years to realize this, but only took two weeks to completely turn 180 degrees.

Fear is a friend! Not only does fear warn us of danger, but it further motivates us to go beyond our limits. Inaction is action wasted. So in knowing that fear is no longer an obstacle but instead a great motivator, I've come to terms with it in fully understanding my relationship to it. We are cool with one another- there's an understanding. lol With that said, just excited more than ever about this new work I'm about to crank out.

Gonna push these flowers to a whole different level unlike any of us has ever seen....LET'S GO HONEYS!!

The Power in Being Nice (a focus on benevolence and authenticity)

2011-02-12T17:38:00.124-05:00

Whew honeys did you re-cooperate from the holidays yet? lol I've been running around getting stuff done, working things out with my team figuring out what's next.

Lots of great news to share- not to mention the excitement behind it all. Goes to show what a tough mindset and unstoppable perseverance can do.

As you know, I've been active in donating art to a few organizations for their fundraiser auctions. I think it's important to contribute and give whenever you can whether it's to organizations, supporting friends, and just helping out whenever you can, however you can.

In fact, my reputation is built on benevolence and giving a helping hand. Which adds up in the swing of things because when opportunities are presented the art communities in Atlanta, Los Angeles, and beyond have been amazingly supportive in providing nominations, references, etc.

The years in LA have seared unforgettable, but necessary lessons and experiences. Although last year was a tumultuous year of fake friends; adversity; trickery and changes, it was also full of love; support; loyalty; opportunity; and clarity. The experiences have inspired me to "step it up" and accept responsibility for all of it. In accepting true responsibility for all that's happened, it's allowed me to also accept true possibilities.

Accepting responsibility means knowing that all decisions and consequences, in the end comes down to me. Not everyone is perfect but when I do mess up, I step up and make whatever it takes to make it right. You have no choice, because your reputation depends on it. If it means admitting that I'm wrong, I suck it up and admit it. If it means others keeping you accountable, I suck it up and take it. Because in the end it's all about sculpting the best version of me that I can be. Accepting responsibility and being held accountable does that.

Living in LA, you see a lot of crap. Better yet, being a creative in LA or NY is like stepping into a hurricane and holding on for dear life. In witnessing others who lie; manipulate; connive and burn others on their way to so-called "success", I know within my heart it's short-lived and only a matter of time before it all comes crumbling down. I mean, look at Enron. lol

You can only go so far before a reputation built on manipulating others begins to work against you. Those people have to constantly reinvent themselves in new cities and surround themselves with new people forever running away while hiding behind a facade- what a pathetic way to exist. Believe me, I've encountered many fitting that description as I'm sure you have too.

What I realized is that those people are running away from themselves- from facing their own authenticity. Or perhaps it's because their own authenticity remains so unbearable that they must keep running in the first place. lol

Throughout all this came a revelation strengthening my commitment to two things- my art, and approaching the journey with benevolence. As I discover womanhood through being an artist, you come to side with a few things- particularly, what you stand for. It's not easy to remain committed to one's beliefs when everyone else is telling you how to best live your life.

The adversity I've survived is an accomplishment. Yes, an accomplishment. Without it I couldn't have given my full loyalty and commitment to this art life nor to approaching it with full servitude and benevolence.

It forced me to question my own authenticity. What is "authenticity"?

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines authenticity as:

"1 of undisputed origin; genuine
• made or done in the traditional or original way, or in a way that faithfully resembles an original
• based on facts; accurate or reliable
• (in existentialist philosophy) relating to or denoting an emotionally appropriate, significant, purposive, and responsible mode of human life."

What stuck out for me were the following words- genuine; reliable. But especially the last definition, "relating to or denoting an emotionally appropriate, significant, purposive, and responsible mode of human life". That is freaking beautiful! No wonder so many people run away from themselves cuz they can't stand to deal with who they are! lol

You see, authenticity is genuineness. It's real. Furthermore, it's about being real and keeping it real. Authenticity is a being. Some may argue authenticity as being apart of someone's style, blah blah, but we're not talking about that here. We're talking about authenticity as an attribute of genuineness.

I knew having a benevolent authenticity for family, friends, collectors, colleagues, supporters, fans, and the world in general was part of my nature. But how do I utilize my love for the world and benevolence on a much bigger scale through everything that I do? Especially through my art?

One book has especially influenced me in my business philosophy- The Power of Nice by Linda Kaplan Thaler and Robin Koval. Though business-world is presumed to be a world of dog-eat-dog, sharks, and wolves in sheep clothing- I found it against my nature to trample over others on your way to the top as a practical accepted mode of success. So when I found this book, I was so relieved that you can win and get to the top by being nice. In fact, the authors of this book built their whole company around this philosophy. Always having gone against the grain anyway, this was perfect for me. Yee!

So you ask, how has keeping it real all these years helped me? How has being nice contributed to my career?

What's come of it is a solid team of seasoned professionals most of whom I've known for a decade that's immersed themselves to be apart of this team as they've witnessed my persistence and "no-matter-what" attitude. These professionals specialize in legal, accounting, management, PR, grants/residencies, and artist representation. I am beyond honored to have attracted such a phenomenal team of outstanding professionals. Their survey of my character over the past decade gave me unspoken credibility that didn't need persuasion simply because benevolence builds trust.

Currently, my work has a presence in Atlanta, Houston, and Los Angeles. The team is spread out across the US with numerous allies including collectors, curators, and critics, amongst other supporters. There are ten galleries who have shown interest in the Porn Flowers and ready to discuss showing them. Six curators ready for new work to put in shows; a waiting list of existent commissions; a list of people "interested" in commissions; interviews I have yet to respond to; a few celebrities said they were fans. And, the crazy thing is, I haven't even started the targeted marketing campaign I was planning on implementing yet. Yee!

What did I do you ask? Three magical questions plus an enthusiastic, friendly attitude: "How can I support you? What can I do to help you? How can I make things easier for you?" That's it. *shrug

Calling people and reaching out to them; volunteering; donating; being there for others; contributing, supporting, encouraging, lending a helping hand; being a good friend; going out of my way to network and hook others up for stuff in support of making their dreams come true... That's what I did. I guess all those love seeds I threw out there finally began to sprout, huh?

Recently, I was at an art opening and ran into an artist I'd been familiar with but never had the pleasure of meeting (we were in a few shows together). I was standing there catching up with an old friend of mine and when this artist introduced himself, we both acknowledged each other and was delighted to have finally met. Then he said something that caught me off guard: "You're so sincere-I hope it's real" then looked to my friend for validation. My friend vouched for me that my sincerity indeed, was real. Later that week I ended up helping this artist with some feedback and insight concerning some challenges he was facing proving that my sincerity is real.

Sure, I've had to show my Bunny fangs and raise some hell when I've been tested, but it's just not my style to go around trampling others to get ahead. I consider that cheating. People often tell me, "Yun, you're too nice". The truth is, it works for me. Being nice, sincere, genuine, and authentic is how I've gained the opportunities, connections, and relationships I've been fortunate to receive.

In this world of dog-eat-dog business acumen, being nice has worked for me. It has helped me stand out amongst the crowd. Sure, some people are hesitant upon first meeting me and don't quite know how to respond to my bubbly sincere happiness- but after the fourth or fifth meeting when they realize it's unashamedly consistent, they start to open up. Hee hee.

The point is: I don't mind watching malevolent hares dig deep holes for themselves burning bridges left and right trampling over others in the race to success- although the hurt they cause others disappoints. I'd rather remain as the benevolent tortoise that lays a firm foundation based on integrity, contribution, and service. After all, my team and I are building a legacy-- and not interested in fads. lol

Ascension; human nature; the Bunny way

2011-01-13T23:06:00.020-05:00

I am so glad it's a new year! Lots of energy; excited; new lessons; new possibilities. Just so proud to look behind you and think, "I survived that". To look ahead and think, "I'm gonna get that". To be in the present and think, "This is really awesome".

Made goals, have a plan, and just implementing now. Painting again, deciding how this bi-coastal thing is gonna go down. Lots of traveling this year, so it's all up in the air. But I just have to trust and go with the flow.

One thing that I've regained is FAITH. I've discovered an ascension of sorts within myself. A shedding of who I've been into a newer, better version of me. I'm working on becoming her. Had a conversation with a stranger recently about faith and realized somewhere in all that mess last year, I'd lost mine. I had determination, but I'd lost faith...

Another thing I learned was about human nature. A friend said, "Yun, people are naturally selfish". I so didn't want to believe it. Yes, people can be selfish. So if that's the "norm", then I will do the opposite. After all, I've always been a rebel. lol I will rise above to do extra good. Never one to go along with the crowd, I won't go this time around either.

Throughout all this it's become clear who I'm gonna be. How I'm gonna run things from now on. The cool thing is, I will remember exactly who treated me with respect and was in my corner and who rubbed my face in the dirt. I think it's funny when people reveal who they really are to you.

But through all this, I've ascended. Ascended to a whole different level within myself. I am so glad all this stuff happened to me, because it just made me that much stronger. If anything, it's brought out the beautiful side of human nature- I've chosen to "see" the wonderful side of the love around me, but especially my own nature.

I've chosen to release myself from the negativity surrounding me as I've learned how to channel it into motivation. Hell, I know everyone talks. Your friends, acquaintances, everyone talks about everybody. Perhaps that's just part of human nature. But to let it get to you is when one has lost themselves. I've seen it and witnessed it in others. They get so enthralled in what others say and what people think, what's going on with others that they completely make a fool out of themselves; losing themselves. Becoming a sad, insecure victim within their own realm. The most freeing of freedoms is to not give a damn about what others think. I'm happy to say, I've finally reached that.

In this recent search of love, spirituality, faith, and authenticity, I've truly ascended and grown. Forgiving is so freeing and powerful. Being generous and giving is freeing and powerful- not to mention, indifference. The lesson I learned through all of this, is don't get involved in other people's insecurities and projections of themselves. I accept responsibility that I've allowed myself to get caught up in others' false fears within and of themselves. Accusations, negative opinions, paranoia.

Upon reflection, you can't help but genuinely just love them more. I know, "Yun did you just say love?" WTF? Yeah y'all. Love them. Because it's through pure genuine love that the situation dissipates. I've realized that instead of responding the same way they come at you, to rise above and come at them with love. Then it causes them to step back and look at the situation from a different perspective and often they realize what they were projecting upon you in the first place. To resolve, is to rise above. And really, whoever has the last "lick" is the real loser. Simply because they didn't have the control to resolve for themselves to walk away.

What is the Bunny way? I'm gonna try something different. With the world in such a state of uncertain flux, I will hold peace and certainty; stability and calmness within. Regaining faith has allowed me to do that. Trusting myself has allowed me to do that. While I can't control the chaos within others' hearts or what is happening outside of me in the world, I have absolute control to have peace and serenity within myself. Furthermore, I have the POWER to bring that peace, serenity, and certainty to other people. That is good use of power, I think.

So if human nature is a selfish, self-serving, "it is what it is and you can't do anything about it" behavior, then so be it. Perhaps 99% of the world operates on that level. But that won't be my nature. My nature is to be completely true to myself and do as much as I can to serve and love. If people think I'm too happy, too excited, too nice, too forgiving, too genuine, too authentic, too whatever- then they kind of have a new problem on their hands don't they? lol

That's another thing - in being kind and constantly reaching out to others, there is another benefit besides experiencing the pleasure of helping someone. The person you're reaching out to shows exactly who they are by their response (or sometimes, their lack of response lol). Y'all know it's a given that I'm simply genuine and nice to everyone I meet. It's a virtue I hold close to my heart and quite proud of, as kindness takes discipline and really, is an art form. lol It's true, laugh all you want (but you know I'm right).

We've heard that saying, "Kindness is weakness". But is it? Or is it really strength and discipline? Example: I was at the grocery store getting some salad dressing the other day. I approached the cashier with the same outgoing happy attitude that I usually do when meeting people. This lady wouldn't make eye contact, didn't smile, slouched over; when I thanked her, she didn't reply and just looked straight ahead. Ok, I reckoned, maybe she's having a bad day- we all have bad days as I know I'm not always happy and enthusiastic to see people. Then her co-worker said hello and she immediately lit up, was all smiles acting warm, full of energy and I thought, "WOW. This lady is really that disconnected from her world and living in such a small cocoon for herself that joy and abundance can't float freely through her all the time".

So you see, in being kind to someone, it's really a test of that person's own virtue and how they are (or aren't) able to handle kindness and abundance coming at them. After all, you're just reaching out to give assistance; support; and good vibes; right? It's not really your problem if they can't handle it, true?

Note: So in essence, kindness isn't weakness. Kindness is a power, a blessing that you bestow on others. How it is treated and received is a reflection of the person you're giving it to; telling you multitudes about them.

Also, don't get it twisted- just because sweet benevolent Bunnies have the discipline and abundant heart to be kind doesn't mean we can't turn into growling clawing tigers when defending our turf as a very necessary, last resort. ;)

Getting beat up; a turkey shooting a bird; Miami; LOVE - Happy New Year!

2011-01-01T01:50:00.020-05:00

Happy New Year! This is a wondrous day- 1/1/11. Looking at it just makes me soo happy. But first, a quick recap of what's happened since my last post.

Was very fortunate to travel most of December all over the South. Went up and down Florida stopping by my hometown of Tallahassee, then Tampa, then Miami for Art Basel, then stopped in those same cities on the way back to Atlanta (since I was driving). Then went to Birmingham, Alabama to celebrate Christmas with my homegirl Laura. Had to adjust being back on the East Coast, let me tell ya. Being in Atlanta and Tallahassee especially, took getting used to.

For one, I simply didn't recognize Atlanta anymore. What the hell is this Atlantic Station? lol I had to Google it to read up on it like a damn tourist. Man, I've really been gone for awhile that entire neighborhoods have been built! It's something to be excited and proud of.

No matter what, I love Atlanta. I love the history of this great city; I love my history here in this great city. I love the people who are die-hard Atlantans who represent this city. The city makes me feel rebellious and safe whereas in LA I have to be on guard all the time. Driving around ATL made me realize all the cool developments I have yet to explore while appreciating the memories here. Still, it was weird adjusting to being back. I couldn't remember the roads, lol...

But that certainly wasn't the case in Tallahassee (there are only five real roads there). Things pretty much looked the same, except the businesses weren't the same businesses that were there when I left ten years ago. Club Park Avenue is now some insurance company or something. lol I felt really safe there. Completely unguarded. I could just be anyone there. I remember after graduating highschool how I couldn't wait to get the hell up out of there and headed to Atlanta since it was the closest major city. But visiting ten years later, I looked forward to seeing those places that gave me so many memories. Tallahassee is pure. Reminded me of my own purity within.

I visited my pal Monica, my highschool art teacher Mrs. B, and my homegurl Amber. So great to see old friends, people you truly love. Let me tell you about Monica. I haven't seen this gurl in seventeen years cuz we lost touch after middle school but I found her on Facebook and was so happy when I did. We picked up our friendship like no time had passed at all.

Monica is special because she was my only friend in elementary school. My mom used to say, "Yun, where's your little black friend?" and I'd say, "Mom, she's not just my little 'black' friend- she's my only friend". Y'all, let me tell you. I used to get my ass BEAT UP by these other black girls in school. They were mean as hell- tripping me, pulling my hair, cursing at me, spitting on me. Just terrible.

Monica would be her lioness self and roar at them while my little timid self hid behind the seat on the bus. I remember one time she yelled at them, "Why don't you mess with someone black like you?!" lol Then they would leave me alone and just call me names but at least they stopped hitting me. Man, if it weren't for Monica, my Chink ass wouldn't have made it through elementary school. lol Yay, diversity!

The visit to my art teacher's house to see her family was just as heart-warming. I used to babysit her son when he was four or five. Now he's nineteen and 6'5". Damn. lol I love Mrs. B cuz she's the reason I'm an artist. The absolute reason. She loves all her students, but really kept her eye on me and gave me the extra encouragement I needed.

I remember one time we were at some art festival thing and she introduced me as an "artist". She said, "Yun is also an artist". Hearing it sounded weird to me at the time, but it was a turning point in my life. I credit her with giving me my identity as an artist - she was the first person to see me as that, even before my parents. So teachers, know that you have impact. Know that all the hard work caring and worrying for us kids really does pay off-it's life changing. Mrs. B changed my life. If it weren't for her, I'd probably ended up as an accountant (or something completely non-creative). lol No offense to accountants!

Headed to Amber's after that. Amber and I have been friends for fifteen years or so. Crazy huh? We headed to Thomasville, Georgia (a city known for its roses) with her husband and the rest of her family for a holiday festival thingy. Like I said, I had to get adjusted being back in the South.

We stopped by Harden's Taxidermy (Thomasville) and there were all these stuffed animals inside. I felt really bad for them since they looked so cute and all (hey if it's furry it's friendly right? lol). Look how friendly it looks!

Amber's mom suggested I buy this next thing with her for Amber as a Christmas present. It's a turkey shooting a bird! This is how Southerners entertain ourselves. I know, don't judge.

PETA I think you just got another convert! I had to hightail it out of there I swear the animals started talking to me....

All in all Tallahassee was fun. It's nice knowing it's only four and a half hours away anytime I need a little getaway...

Which brings us to Miami. The last time I went to Art Basel was in 2007 and honestly I had a fun time seeing friends but I was so exhausted from all that was going on. This year they had sixteen fairs including Art Basel and to fit all those in within six days was just too much. They even had an article noting the syndrome "Art Basel Frazzle"! lol Man, I was definitely Art Basel Frazzled. However, I did find the SCOPE art fair to be especially strong. Art Basel as always, impressive.

As I sit here late in the night pondering this new year and digesting the last- I am grateful. Grateful for my family, friends, and fans. Grateful for the clarity and support I've received. Most of all, grateful for LOVE in my life. Love has been the biggest inspiration of all. Love has healed me. Love has protected me. Love has made me brave. In witnessing all this love from LA and ATL, I can't help but become obsessed in learning, analyzing, and exploring it. What do you know about it, really? *tease Have you stopped and analyzed it concerning its presence in your life?

It's time to get back on the grind and back on the horse. Sure I may have fallen with my face grinded up against the pavement with somebody's foot smacked against my head, but all that has fueled so much as I'm still reaching. That's all that matters. The biggest motivator has been the eight galleries that's waiting for new work that's interested in showing my stuff and a few new curators I recently met that found me through my website. Not bad for having your face grinded up against the pavement, I would say. lol Either way Bunny it's time to get to work!

If I just love the world harder while becoming more authentic for myself and ride this mofo til the wheels fall off, that's all I need to worry about right?

Gonna be MIA for a lil while...

2010-11-02T02:52:00.010-04:00

You guys, now that the dust has settled I can finally focus on what was planned prior to the minor distractions. I consider them "minor" because in comparison to how much worse things could have been, they really are minor. One of the things I learned is to keep things in relative perspective- and to always ask, "Compared to what?" I could say, "Yun you dealt with a lot of drama the last few months". But then you have to keep it in perspective and make it relative to things that could be much worse. I credit learning this from 177 Mental Toughness Secrets of the World Class. I love this book so much, it's my Bible for mental toughness.

Sad to say, I won't have as much time in the next few months to dedicate to blogging as much as I'd like. My team and I are planning a big launch of sorts; plus I have to build inventory like crazy. Sold out of mostly all current inventory, except New Gallery (Houston) has a good selection of various works ranging from Porn Flowers to whimsical fun gauche drawings and even some "Nipple Portraits". Sophia Louisa Projects in LA also has some pieces on consignment including four new pieces of the latest Porn Flowers. Make sure you go to "39Now" opening at d.e.n. contemporary Nov. 18th! Visit Sophia's website for details.

It's exciting to be in a position where demand for work is high yet there's still a lot to do. The creativity part is the easy part as there's so many ideas flowing constantly. The challenging part is finding the time to do all the admin/marketing/schmoozing/managing necessary to keep it going. Hey, I'm not complaining- just so EXCITED! Bunny Yee! (excited squeal)

Won't say too much but planning a big launch, making new porn flowers while fulfilling existing commissions, and experimenting with new art ideas (ping pong ball peace doves!). Just making it all come together. Bunny POW!

Thank you for your support darlins, I am so grateful to even have the opportunity to go after a dream. I'm a lucky bitch!

Getting refreshed by Atlanta art folk

2010-10-31T19:09:00.027-04:00

It's going to be quite intense til the end of the year. Whew! Y'all know I hardly ever go out and even worked through Halloween weekend. Plus a slight agoraphobia has hit so just not really in the mood to be around large crowds either. lol Crazy deadlines; so much to do and prepare for, but it's all so exciting!

I gotta admit y'all, I was not excited about coming back to Atlanta. But I had no choice. Fate works in mysterious ways and I know now that I'm meant to be here for the next year or so. I hope to be back to LA sometime, but Atlanta is home. It's where my parents are and where I come to remind myself where I came from (besides Tallahassee).

Whatever Spirit thing is up there explained to me that I'm supposed to be in Atlanta for now- to rest; recooperate; strategize; reinvent; appreciate; grow; give and contribute. I gotta admit my first week back I just felt so beat up. Felt like a complete loser cause I had to move home due to one little snag. No matter how hard I fought seemed like I'd failed. But slowly, the Atlanta community gave me some CPR and brought me back to life. lol

It started with Felicia Feaster (Y'all Google her there's so many links I don't know which one to link,). We had coffee at "our spot" Intermezzo where we'd had coffee eight years ago when she interviewed me for a feature article in Creative Loafing. We'd kept up with each other over the years by phone or Facebook but haven't seen one another since then so I was very excited to be able to spend some time with her. It's just great to see people face to face, feeling their energy, having them absorb your giddiness (y'all know I'm giddy!). Eight years had flown by yet it didn't feel like it one bit. "You haven't changed Yun", she said. I hope not. I hope I didn't lose my bubbly attitude or my sincerity. I'm 31 now- the last time we sat at Intermezzo I was 23. Yup, it's great to be back.

That same week my pal Jiha Moon took me to Iona Rozeal Brown's artist talk at Saltworks Gallery. It was awesome to view her work as I'd never seen it in person yet. Her talk was fun, engaging, informative. Most of all everyone there including the gallery owners were so friendly and hospitable. I wasn't used to all that sincere friendliness, lol. The only thing I was disappointed in Atlanta, was the turnout. The turnout was good for Atlanta, but not good enough consider how awesome Iona Rozeal Brown is. To have someone like her come through Atlanta is a huge deal. I'm glad the art community appreciated it and came out to support but shame on the rest of the city. Plus, the talk was free so y'all definitely didn't have an excuse! *Another sad reason why we need more contemporary arts education in the system

I also stopped by my alma mater Agnes Scott College at the Dalton Gallery on my way to pick up some wood panels and bumped into Susan Bridges of WhiteSpace814 and Lisa Alembik, the Director of Dalton Gallery. The show that was there looked fantastic. I always knew the caliber of artists coming out of Atlanta are just as great as anywhere else in the country- the group show "Quadrennial" that's currently up proves just that. Also stopped by to see my life drawing/printmaking professor Anne Beidler. Aw....memories.

Y'all know I'm one of the most positive people ever- sometime to a fault. lol Aside from all my supportive friends who have helped me through this shit time both in LA and ATL, Jiha Moon went out of her way to bring Bunny back to life. She's the type of artist every artist should strive to be- hardworking, great attitude, family oriented, contributive, supportive. We went out for Thai and she literally breathed some life back into Bunny with her enthusiasm. She also introduced me to a lot of people in the Atlanta art community I didn't know since I'd been gone for so long. That's what we gotta do- lift others up when they're down. Confident people like Jiha did just that. I know I'm not the only one grateful for her support and encouragement. She reaches out to so many within the community here. Let's put it this way - you're a lucky bitch if you have the privilege of having her friendship. :)

Next I went to the Kehinde Wiley talk at the High Museum of Art. Now that was impressive. The house was packed! I first learned of his work in 2005 when I was in a group show with him. See, you can never think you know it all because I was on the fence about whether to attend the talk or not (my agoraphobia started to talk me out of it, lol).

Note: Y'all know I'm just kidding about being agoraphobic right? I think we all go through times when we feel private and not in the mood to deal with too many people. I'm definitely a one-on-one type person who likes to spend quality time goofing off being silly. ;)

Well I'm so glad I went cuz Bunny learned lots! He talked about how he developed the idea and incorporated global influences into his work. Y'all just have to learn about this dude and his work cuz I don't want to misconstrue anything since writing isn't my forte. lol The point is if I didn't go to this talk I wouldn't have been inspired nor learned as much as I did. So proud of the High Museum for bringing innovative contemporary programming to the City of Atlanta. Afterwards there was a book signing. I felt like a neanderthal coming back because the museum was completely different than I remembered after its renovations. I didn't know where anything was!

The next day I went to my friend Kojo Griffin's house. Y'all need to just Google dude if you don't know who he is cuz there's just too many links on him and I didn't know which one to link here. lol I hadn't seen Kojo in years either since 2005 maybe? We caught up and brainstormed; shared viewpoints; and each got something out of bouncing ideas off one another.

That's the thing about us artists- we are our separate brands doing our own unique thing so I've never felt threatened by other artists. "Oh Yun do you know there's this dude named Jonathan Yeo out there making flowers out of porn?" certain friends have shared out of concern for me. "He's stealing your idea! Aren't you worried?" they ask.

First of all, there are tons of artists out there that have used porn in their art. Chris Ofili has used it in his work as well. Porn to me is just another medium- like the colors red, yellow, or blue. How ridiculous would it be to say, "Man that dude (Yeo) is copying me because he uses the color blue in his work too". You know? How stupid does that sound? That's what I mean that artists are our own specific brand. I actually like Yeo's portraits and collages. They're neat and his technical skill is very admirable. Why would I be threatened by his technique?

I can honestly say that there isn't another artist out there in the world that's Chinese-American that makes flowers out of porn magazines with a feminist message of hope derived from a real-life experience as a stripper when her mom had cancer. I'm sure Jonathan Yeo and Chris Ofili would agree. :)

So you see why it's not a threat whatsoever to reach out to fellow artists as Jiha and Kojo have done to show love and support in helping one another? I think too often artists are way competitive with one another than they should be. Regarding these art competitions that are everywhere, we shouldn't be threatened either. We should go in with a focused mind to only compete and push ourselves- to present and create work to push ourselves into a more refined, developed being. Next time you apply for an art competition, residency or grant, keep that in mind and give it your best shot in sharing with the world what you do best- cuz you should be that confident enough in your work that it's that original. Otherwise, keep thinking. lol

After I left Kojo's house and went to a friend's house that I'd gone to college with at Agnes Scott. She just had a baby so we sat with her husband and some of her other friends to a evening of laughs and wine. Ah, simple joys.

Last week I went to the Atlanta Contemporary Art Center for another lecture hosted by Stuart Horodner (Artistic Director of the Atlanta Contemporary Art Center), with Michael Rooks (Wieland Family Curator of Modern and Contemporary Art, High Museum), Brian Holcombe (Director of Saltworks Gallery), and artist Gyun Hur on the panel. The subject was about "role models". They shared what inspired them to become who they are today through the many mentors they had in their own journeys.

Afterwards Deanna Sirlin, her intern Emily and I went out for lunch and stopped by EK Huckaby's show at Poem 88 @ Tanner-Hill Gallery. Poem 88 is an art collective composed of Robin Bernat, Karen Tauches, and Jon Ciliberto. Jon used to help me with my art projects when I lived here before and we used to go to Oga's (this Southern restaurant that was owned by Mr. Kim, this Koren dude) when I was experimenting with photography doing a series about being "Asian & Southern". So whenever Jon goes there, he would take a picture of his food and tag me on Facebook, hee hee. All great fun.

So all in all I'm getting adjusted. I was pretty crusty; beat up; and bummed out about being back. But the city has changed lots in the last six years that I've been gone and being the positive go-getter Bunny that I am, y'all know I make the most of everything with whatever is given to me. The hospitality and support from all friends on both coasts not to mention the support of my family has been priceless. I'm really happy.

The thing that I've really learned throughout the last few months is the important lesson of how crucial it is to contribute where-ever you are. Whether it's lifting someone's spirits up; or donating to an art auction; or sharing resources / contacts, or teaching a group by sharing what you've learned- we must do it. Which brings me back to a conversation I had with Felicia Feaster right before I moved back.

I called her to see if I could put her down as a reference for something and let her know I was moving back to Atlanta. I admitted that I wasn't excited and that I was just going to hide out in my Bunnyhole and not let anyone know I was even in town, lol. She told me to get out, be out, and go do things as Atlanta has grown lots and to not be afraid to get out. I'm so glad I listened along with Jiha and Deanna urging me to go do stuff.

Through all this support I've gotten, it's inspired me to further contribute. To keep giving to the community where-ever I am whether its here or LA. It just feels good to contribute- to share and learn. Just gonna focus on helping others, losing weight, and getting that Bunny money! lmao Where-ever Bunny is at, get ready to get some big love. I'm ready! Are you?

"39NOW" - Curated by Sophia Louisa @ d.e.n contemporary - Opens Nov.18, 2010

2010-09-22T17:26:00.000-04:00

39NOW
Group Exhibition Curated by Sophia Louisa November 17 – December 17, 2010 Opening Reception: Thursday, November 18, 5:30-8:00 pm
den contemporary art
@ Pacific Design Center 8687 Melrose Avenue, #B261 West Hollywood, CA 90069 323-422-6340 or 310-773-1460 Gallery hours: Monday through Friday, 11-5pm
Mailing Address: PO Box 6602, Beverly Hills, CA 90212
info@dencontemporaryart.com
39NOW unites thirty-nine exceptional artists, from the emerging to the well-established, living in and around Los Angeles. Presented by den contemporary art and curated by Sophia Louisa, 39NOW is a conceptual exhibition wherein each artist has created a new piece of work based on the circumstances of the here and now. The term “now” is conceptual in and of itself. The moment passes and soon becomes “then.” Capturing the moment through art specifically created with the perception of now, through the talents of thirty-nine artists -- all of whom are women -- is the basis of this exhibition.
Initially inspired by Judy Chicago’s ‘The Dinner Party’ (1974-79) wherein thirty-nine artists collaborated on one piece, curator Sophia Louisa brings together the same number of artists to create an individual piece within the same time period (June – September 2010) to explore what is happening now, whether on a personal or public level. Collectively, each artist explores the elements of empowerment, strength, fear, independence, and the ability to keep moving forward.
Participating artists are Kim Abeles, Joyce Aiken, Sophia Allison, Fumiko Amano, Yun Bai, Kimber Berry, Andrea Bowers, Nancy Buchanan, Gul Cagin, Heather Cantrell, Jennifer Celio, Ya Ya Chou, Angel Chen, Abbey Dubin, Vivian Flynn, Simone Gad, Kristina Faragher, Alexandra Grant, Laurie Hassold, Mary Heebner, MAL IDEA, Tulsa Kinney, Rebecca Lowry, Leora Lutz, Anne Martens, Christine Morla, Nikki Nash, Ruby Osorio, Snezana Petrovic, Carol Powell, Sandy Rodriguez, Leigh Salgado, Gina Stepaniuk, Lacey Terrell, Daena Title, Marika Krissman Tsircou, Katy Unger, Marnie Weber, and Patssi Valdez.
For more information, please contact: Donna Enad Napper, Owner/Director, den contemporary art at 323-422-6340/info@dencontemporaryart.com -or- Sophia Louisa, Curator at 310-773-1460/sophia@sophialouisaprojects.com
den contemporary art is located at #B261 in the 2nd floor of the PDC Blue Building. Gallery hours are Monday through Friday, from 11am to 5pm and by appointment. Gallery mailing address is P.O. Box 6602, Beverly Hills, CA 90212.
For Members of Press: Complimentary PDC parking is available by calling ahead at (310) 360‐6404.
www.dencontemporaryart.com / Become a fan of den contemporary art on Facebook! www.sophialouisaprojects.com / Become a fan of Sophia Louisa Projects on Facebook! www.pacificdesigncenter.com / Art Meets Design Blog: www.godesigngo.com Design Loves Art is a residency program shaped by artistic viewpoints and experiments in design.

Roller coasters, LA lessons, commitment to health, transition to light

2010-08-07T17:50:00.000-04:00

Things have been really busy. Crazy, in fact. The next year and a half will be more than adventurous - it will be a pivotal time in my career, I can feel it. Other than that I've been working my butt off. Moving things forward and kicking adversity in the butt at the same time. In the end, the lessons learned and the experiences give comfort in knowing how to handle BS next time.

I don't have much to tell lately except that I've been really working my ass off. Working on myself refining everything, improving everything. Y'all know I'm a pretty prviate person and don't get out much, except when I do get out. Other than that I've learned quite a few lessons. Maybe in the long view of things some would consider it challenging, but I really am enjoying the journey.

This trip of entrepreneurship has been quite a roller-coaster. Or, I would imagine it like riding a mechanical bull (although I have yet to get on one) or even a real one, for that matter. Life is like riding a bull, I suppose. You just have to get on and hope you stay on.

The lessons I've earned lately have taught me more of how the world works, and how I choose to exist in it. I say "earned" because I really do feel as though these lessons are a blessing, when you realize your epiphany and truth reveals itself. You learn who your friends are, as opposed to who the talkers are (carrot-danglers, as I call them). My tolerance has been short lately I've just been hitting the "delete" button on some folks. lol

I'm a pretty private person so I keep to myself a good bit, going about my business. Pretty much everything just has to step up. I looked at my little counter today, 597 days left. Except the last few weeks has been killer! And the next few are going to be more killer. I've been keeping a good pace this week, catching up on well-deserved sleep, moving forward.

One particular lesson I've learned is that I've allowed people to tell their own story to me. Who they really are. Who the carrot-danglers are, who your real friends are, who really loves you. It's never been more clear. I've never been more surprised by the help I've received from those who you thought wouldn't help you, to being disappointed by those who you thought you could surely count on. That's the thrill of being on a roller-coaster, huh?

There's been so much going on, with this soiree at Bardot @ Avalon, Aug. 11th/8pm, then LA Craft Experience Aug. 14th in Chinatown just this month, it's kinda crazy. I didn't push myself as hard this week but kept things going, while recouping strength. Next week is going to be pretty crazy.

All in all just continuing on with my journey here in LA. Going on six years in September, I can't say I'm growing old of this place yet. In fact, I've barely started to take a bite yet. It feels that way. LA feels "big" to me still. There are so many cool people to meet, things to do, I don't have any time hardly. I stay close to friends in the neighborhood and talk frequently to friends in other parts of LA but I wish I had more time to build more meaningful relationships with my current acquaintances now, especially.

That's what excites me about the city. I have absolutely no regrets about moving here whatsoever. LA has definitely given me the challenge I was looking for, as well as some wild experiences (just as wild as my Atlanta experiences, lol). I've been so busy, I haven't even had the chance to check out Napa, the Redwoods, or much of California but I have been to Big Bear, near Santa Cruz, San Diego. Still, lots to do and see.

Although I received an offer to head back to Atlanta to work on my work for a year and be closer to family, I didn't consider the offer for long. LA never fails to fascinate me with its variety of free, fun stuff to do. I find myself sitting on a beach when I can afford the time often except lately, stress has been high with tight deadlines.

Even standing on a friend's porch today, I was looking at the cars going by, appreciating the way the Cali sun makes everything gleam a certain way. I don't know how to explain it. The way the sun makes everything look, it's different than that Southern East Coast gleam. There's almost something spiritual, heightened; with West Coast gleam. lol But I gotta say the trees on the West Coast can't compared to the trees in the South. The trees out here all look crusty, dried up, you just want to spray with a little squirt of water so bad. Whereas the trees down South are beautifully green, crisp, luscious, juicy, flowing with moisture. Now mix that with some Southern East Coast gleam, and that is called heaven with a glass of homemade lemonade in the afternoon on a rocking chair. Uh huh.

I feel good about LA. I feel as though I have a fresh start on this place. You can only learn how things work in a city after you've paid your time, and your dues. It's nice to be able to decide to start over. After a few tumbles, I still love it here. I am comforted when I fantasize about all the great things that could happen here. You can look out over LA, at LA, look at yourself in LA.... all I can know is, I'm just getting started here. Plus, the California sun makes me feel beautiful. It makes me feel like a golden papaya. ;)

It's true that California makes you more health conscious. I was never very health-conscious, though I stayed physically active. Living in California has really taught me about eating right. Well, I really owe it to Trader Joe's. lol. But seriously, I developed a new habit; I have to eat veggies everyday or else it just feels weird. Lately it's been hard because when stress gets in my way, I really fall off my eating plan and the workout plan. I just end up eating anything to not be hungry instead of reaching for something healthy.

I found out what works for me is Michael Thurmond's Six-Week Body Makeover and Tony Horton's P90X. It's really just adjusting to new habits.

For me the eating plan part of Michael Thurmond's plan was impressive. It's hard to explain, you just have to go to the site and check it out. It taught me how to eat, and what to eat. I was completely lost regarding what was healthy for me but this program really helped me get on track. And the fat just started melting off, literally. The hard part for me was having to eat 5-6 times a day. I found it hard adjusting to being hungry often, and having to eat often.

With exercise I do a combination of cardio and resistance-training. The P90X program is really intense, I just do certain ones. Being outside makes the time go by faster I think so hiking is fun, jogging, and skipping. Hiking is fun I think because it's an intense lower-body workout and just part of the free things you can do in LA. This upcoming quarter I really want to focus on my health: sleeping better, eating right, working out, getting facials,

So the next few years I really want to work on myself. Life is really about living it for yourself so you can serve your loved ones better; dedicating the next few years to my personal development is important to me. I'm really enjoying my thirties, let me tell you. I feel smarter and more sassy, feels life is starting all over again.

I'm really excited to step into the light. The last few years has been rough but that's moving far behind me. I'm ready for the sun!

Who is YUN BAI?

2010-07-21T18:24:00.000-04:00

Yun considers herself a “Southern Asian” and her experiences are grounded in this dichotomy. Born in Beijing, China in 1979, she migrated with her parents to Tallahassee, Florida, at age six. She grew up in a conservative, traditional Chinese setting, complete with extracurricular activities, strict discipline and high expectations. But Yun had the most fun swinging off vines and partying around sink holes; some of her fondest memories include running barefoot in the lush trees of Tallahassee. Thus, she is a “Southern Asian” and will always have the graciousness of the South in her heart.

Moving to Atlanta in 1997, she pursued her passion for art at Agnes Scott College, a private women's school. After graduation, she quickly found representation and began showing at galleries around the city and nationally. Her first international show was at Berlin's Gallery 24 in June of 2004. In 2008, Yun was chosen as one of 30 artists invited from around the world to participate in the Chinese Biennial at the Ku Art Center in Beijing, China.

Self and societal exploration are major themes in Yun’s life and work. She favors an eternal optimism, enjoys creating social stimulatory experiments and strives to make sure her art asks provocative questions. She has been recognized by the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, ART PAPERS Magazine, Art Asia Pacific, LA Weekly (Top 10 Emerging Artists), New American Paintings, World Journal, and The Wall Street Journal. She is represented by Visual Arts Legacy Collections (Atlanta, NY, Europe) and New Gallery (Houston). ARTSPROJEKT also recently selected Yun to be amongst their cache of artists on their international merchandising platform.

“I promise to push myself to create the edgiest art the world has ever seen. My aim is to fulfill visions that stimulate society to think through analyzing history, reflecting our current state, or implementing an optimistic ideal of human conditions. There is both beauty and decay in our environment. Like someone that channels, my duty is to observe and learn from both and express it through my perspective, without apology.”

-- YUN BAI

Yun currently lives and works in Los Angeles.

Yun Bai VITAE

2010-07-21T18:19:00.000-04:00

Born
• Beijing, China 1979

Select Solo

• LA Contemporary, Los Angeles, CA Apr. 2009
• “Elegant Nasty”, Bert Green Fine Art, Los Angeles, CA, Sept. 2007
• “Secrets and Lies” (Two-person show), Atlanta Contemporary Art Center, Atlanta, GA, Jun. 2003

Select Group

2010
• “39NOW”, Sophia Louisa Projects, Los Angeles, CA, 2010
• “Sublime Decadence”, New Gallery, Houston, TX, Feb. 2010

2008
• Chinese Biennial, Ku Art Center, Beijing, China, Aug. 2008
• “Enclosed, Encased & Enrobed”, Orange County Center for Contemporary Art, CA, Jun. 2008
• “FotoFest 2008: Six Viewpoints”, New Gallery, Houston, TX, Feb. 2008

2007
• “U Can't Touch Dis: The New Asian Art", Curated by Eric Shiner, Zone: Contemporary Art, New York, NY, Sept. 2007
• “Altered States: States of Wonder”, City Without Walls, Newark, NJ, Apr. 2007
• “Fetish: The Culture of Fear and Desire”, Kearny Street Workshop, San Francisco, CA, Feb. 2007

2006
• Bert Green Fine Art, Los Angeles, CA, Apr. 2006
• “Red Beans & Rice: Asian Artists in the New South”, (Curated by Craig Bunting & Koan Jeff-Baysa)
• Eleanor D. Wilson Museum, Hollins University, Roanoke, VA, Jan. 2006

2005
• “Neovernacular”, Steve Turner Contemporary, Los Angeles, CA, Nov. 2005 (w/ Matthew Hollis, Shinique Smith, Jeff Sonhouse, Mickalene Thomas, Kehinde Wiley)
• “Red Beans & Rice: Asian Artists in the New South”, (Curated by Craig Bunting & Koan Jeff-Baysa)
• Elizabeth Harper Gallery, Harper Center for the Arts, Presbyterian College, SC, Nov. 2005

2004
• “Transatlantic”, Gallery 24, Berlin, Germany, June 2004

2003
• “Lust”, Fe Gallery, Pittsburgh, PA, Nov. 2003
• “Sweet Dreams”, Soap Factory, Minneapolis, MN, (Curated by Franklin Sirmans), Sept.2003
• Turner & Associates, Atlanta, GA, Sept.2003
• “Unrandom Acts of Violence”, City Gallery East, Atlanta, GA, May 2003

2002
• “Cornucopia: A Rent Party”, Eyedrum Alternative Space, Atlanta, GA, Dec. 2002
• “Pin-up Show”, Museum of Contemporary Art of Georgia, Atlanta, GA, Nov.2002
• “Culture Shock: Georgia’s Foreign Born Artists”, SunTrust Plaza, Atlanta, GA, Jul. 2002
• Mayor’s Art Program, Mayor’s Office, Atlanta, GA, July 2002

Select Achievements

• ARTSPROJEKT (selected artist), 2010
• Chinese Biennial, 2008
• Wall Street Journal, 2007
• New American Paintings, Pacific Edition, Dec. 2006
• “Top 10 Emerging Artists” (LA Weekly), Jan. 2006
• King & Spalding Collection, Atlanta, Georgia, Jul. 2003
• AGL Resources Collection, Atlanta, Georgia, Jul. 2003

Select Bibliography

• Farrugia, Mallory. “Yun Bai: Who’s That Girl?”,Flavorpill, Feb.12,2008. www.flavorpill.com
• “Yun Bai / YunnyBunny: Who’s That Girl?”, Absolute Arts, Jan. 2008, www.absolutearts.com
• Artslant.com, Jan. 2008.http://www.artslant.com/la/events/show/11432-yun-bai-yunnybunny-whosthatgirl
• Schuker, Lauren A.E., "The Art World's Biggest Party", Wall Street Journal, Dec.1,2007, Pg. W4.
• Becker, Noah, “An Interview with Yun Bai aka Yunny Bunny”, interview, WhiteHot Magazine, WM issue #2. www.whitehotmagazine.com, Apr. 2006
• New American Paintings, Pacific Edition, No. 67, Dec. 2006, Open Studios Press.
• Catherine Fox, “Sex Symbols”, review, Atlanta Journal Constitution, Mar.30,2006
• Boingboing.net, featured link, Jan.30,2006
• Peter Frank, “Top 10 Emerging Artists”, Zeitlist, LA Weekly, Jan.6-12,2006
• "Red Beans & Rice”, review, ART PAPERS Magazine, Jan/Feb. 2006
• Art review, “Red Beans & Rice”, World Journal, Sept. 2005
• Franklin Sirmans, “Projects in the Making”, Pg. 96, Art Asia Pacific, April 2004 Dec 6, 2003
• Feaster, Felicia, “Flower of my Secret”, feature story, Creative Loafing, Mar.5-11 2003

Education
• Agnes Scott College, Atlanta, Georgia, BA in Studio Art (Painting), May 2001

Representation:
Visual Arts Legacy Collections (Atlanta, NY, Europe) & New Gallery (Houston)

What is a PORN FLOWER?

2010-07-21T17:48:00.000-04:00

What Is a Porn Flower?
Who is Yun Bai?

7/22/10, LOS ANGELES -
Do you know what a Porn Flower is? A Porn Flower symbolizes that “All women are flowers”, exemplifying that something beautiful can come out of a situation that most would deem difficult. Progressive artist Yun Bai proposes questions concerning new identity as she transforms the intimate flesh and rawness of pornographic images into flowers of hope and beauty. Her unique vision results in art with social impact that questions, reflects, sometimes involving men to support women. Yun personifies the flowers and captures the struggle of the human spirit in that weary moment right before a significant breakthrough.

From afar you see the flowers - beautiful and detailed, but nothing out of the ordinary. Upon closer inspection, the leaves and petals reveal themselves to be female body parts drawn from a collage of imagery found in pornographic magazines. While some may view pornography as objectifying and exploitative, Yun uses the imagery as a form of empowerment to make something beautiful out of what the status quo deems vulgar. The Porn Flowers have grown to symbolize triumph over difficult times with a focus on healing, strength, courage, and enthusiasm for the future.

During college Yun learned her mother had cancer and her parents would be filing for bankruptcy. She was determined to graduate from Agnes Scott College, a private women's school, and needed to come up with money -- fast. She knew she wasn't slick enough to sell drugs, so she worked as an exotic dancer to complete her degree in Studio Art. From one perspective the dancers were mothers, college students, marketing consultants, and gym teachers. From another view they were sex objects, outcasts, drug addicts, and women of ill-repute. Yun constantly struggled with her identity, but finally came to embrace the idea that she is a flower; all women are flowers.

This idea of empowering women to see themselves and each other as flowers of hope and triumph was realized recently by one of Yun's collectors. As her fight with cancer drew to a close, this collector requested she be surrounded with her family, friends and favorite art, including the Porn Flowers. Gathering together these most meaningful aspects of her life she found comfort, support, and the strength to view her passing as the beginning of a new journey. This touched Yun very much as it was the most priceless of compliments she has ever received.

Not only does Yun strive to empower women but to also involve men in supporting equal rights of women. From donating unblemished porn, helping collage, to collaborating with her for charities focused on women's issues, men play an important role in the process of the Porn Flowers.

Yun wants her audience to know that after the struggle, something extraordinarily beautiful always prevails.

About Yun Bai www.yunbai.com
Born in Beijing, China (1979), and raised in Tallahassee, Florida, Yun Bai considers herself both Chinese and Southern. Exhibiting nationally and internationally has allowed Yun recognition by the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, ART PAPERS Magazine, Art Asia Pacific, LA Weekly (Top 10 Emerging Artists), New American Paintings, World Journal, and The Wall Street Journal. She is represented by Visual Arts Legacy Collections (Atlanta, NY, Europe) and New Gallery (Houston). ARTSPROJEKT also recently invited Yun to be on their international merchandising platform.

Artists, prostitutes, jasmine. It goes together somehow.

2010-07-20T23:01:00.001-04:00

Tuesday, July 20th 1:25 am

What up y’all,

My laptop died so I had to go get another one, install everything, and meet my painting deadlines so that’s why I haven’t been around. This month has been crazy! This next year and a half is gonna be CRAZY. I am already bracing myself and getting prepared, believe me.

Adversity has been chasing me hard but I’ve been kicking it in the ass, bunnystyle. ;) I believe this next year and a half will be one of the most exciting times of my life. I just really have to absorb and enjoy it. Hopefully I’ll kick adversity in the ass so hard it’ll leave me alone for a while. I bet you things are going to blow up as soon as I stop taking BS. lol

I have to say, I am really enjoying seeing how this art thing is evolving. Learning tons, for sure. The one thing I realized this week is that no matter how much you hate the game, the only way to thrive and survive is to play it- inevitably. So I might as well really play it with dignity and grace; give it all I have.

Sore allover though. Bunny shoulders tense, sore… I need some strong hands on them now, lol. Let me stop. All-nighter is just getting started and I’m being silly as I get ready to bring some goodies on THURSDAY! Stick around, it’s going to be really awesome.

Y’all I’m about to really do this art thing. I’ve always been doing it, but not full-time. But I feel everything is within divine timing now. It’s all falling into place. Most of all, I’ve achieved a certain level of mental toughness, an enlightenment. Hell you get so used to it you just keep going. Learning who the “carrot-danglers” are by seeing if they keep their word, etc.

I’m so excited y’all, this is the first time I’m really making a targeted effort in marketing my art! I know this sounds kind of stupid, but it’s a big deal. All this time, I’ve been so fortunate to have support without a real marketing effort on my part hardly at all.

I’ve been busy running around learning all kinds of skills and especially enjoyed my time at the financial firm as a financial advisor. It wasn’t me at all, but the skills I acquired there are incredibly valuable- I am using them now in working with an incredible team of eight. It took ten years to build this incredible team, but all the people that came in and out were all necessary and contributed to get where we are now... I appreciate each lesson I learned, especially the painful ones.

So we’ve really brought y’all some cool stuff starting THURSDAY y’all! I’m really going to use my art, my blog, whatever else I can to get crazy on this art journey. I’ve always said when I’m 127, old and decrepit I want to think about the life I explored fully rather than the life I never even attempted. I want to die knowing I really lived.

Y’all, thank you so much for being around now, and then, and way back then too. To my homegirl who protected me when the other little black kids would beat me up in elementary school, highschool pals from Tallahassee , college pals from Atlanta, genuine souls from all over: THIS IS IT!

I feel great going into this art thing whole heartedly because of the sense of responsibility I have towards my parents, friends and collectors, anyone who knows about my art, and for the pure sake of having a duty to whatever Spirit thing is up there to make the most amazing art the world has never seen before. And to help prostitutes get off the street (the neighbor said one came around and hid in the carport while a car went after her?) Which leads us to…

Artists and prostitutes. It’s no secret that artists often congregate therefore forming interesting communities- sometimes starting in the hood. Basically, you would see finished fixer uppers in the hood. When the neighborhood gets “cooler”, businesses and investors quickly move in and the rents go up. This in turn constantly pushes artists to “seek and settle” new territory.

I’ve gotten used to living in neighborhoods where shadiness goes on since I first moved out from the dorms during college. Bars on your windows, the neighborhood prostitute worked/lived caddy corner to you. You would go out and get the paper; she’d be coming off her shift.

Things aren’t that much different here in LA. I thought I was moving to a cute apartment since I found it on “Westside Rentals”, a reputable apartment finder. It was cute- during the day. At night, all hell broke loose. You’d hear cars get broken into, see prostitutes walking up and down, bomb squad camped out taking up the whole block, helicopters overhead about once-twice a week, even the LAPD telling you your neighborhood is bad. I guess that’s why I’ve always had a soft spot for prostitutes- they’ve always been my neighbors.

The neighbors in the hood don’t really mess with you- you’re an artist. What the hell are they gonna do with oil pastels and markers if they rob you? Oooooo, some brand new paint brushes.... LOL! It’s great to be an artist because no one messes with you- you just make the world look pretty and half the time they feel sorry for you lugging your stuff around in the heat thinking you’re gonna be somebody anyways. lol

I remember not too long ago my optimism got the best of me and I wanted to work big. So I ordered two 7'x10' wooden panels and realized they wouldn't fit through the door. I had to find a friend who had a saw so he could help me cut it down to four 5'x 7' pieces. Funny, huh? The hilarious thing was that the panels had to be left outside for a night or two and I was stressed out about someone stealing them. The neighbor goes, "Gurl, this here tha hood. Ain't nobody gonna mess with yo wood!" LOL! Funny how certain items are so valuable to some of us yet others just see it as....fortunately for me, something not worth stealing. ;)

Yet in all this, and all that was in Georgia, I found amazing enjoyable things in my environment. I remember in Atlanta, the way the sun shined through the leaves and grass- the most magnificent green you’ve ever seen. Or getting to sit outside on the porch in a rocking chair, reading a book and drinking real lemonade. Our house parties in the hood were the best- everybody got fed.

Here in my LA neighborhood, I’m grateful for a few special neighbors but lately I’ve been enamored with this jasmine bush that one of the little motels here by my house, has planted. Whenever I walk the dog, I’ll walk by the bushes eyeing which flower bunch I’m going to shove my face into and go into it with a big, deep sniff. I close my eyes, and imagine nirvana. Doing that a few times a day definitely makes life better, trust me.

Lately I’ve realized while we don’t always have the choice to choose where we come from, we always have the choice to choose where we’re going. I think the past shouldn’t be an excuse for us not to explore our future to the fullest. Yah I’m a little scared to expect peak performance during extreme times of stress; friends asking me why I put such pressure on myself. How else will I be able to handle bullshit unless I immerse myself and thrive in it over and over again, repeatedly? So that I know it?

Believe it or not, I do it for the experience; the practice. I made a commitment to this art thing to be able to take care of my parents from the income and to take my career to the next level. The next year and a half will fly by. Are y’all with me?!

In constantly surviving and thriving amidst adversity, I build courage every time I handle something and give them some of this bunny badass! Lol Seriously y’all this is the official start of this art thing heading to the next level. Things are all set and ready to go: we have lots of crazy, creative, guerrilla fun up ahead, I’m gonna really take all the tools I’m given and just go crazy with it. It’s gonna be the biggest “Art Fart” I’ve ever had. Lol

Let’s brace ourselves, everybody. Thank you for praying that I don’t fall flat on my face going all out with this art thing. Things are finally busy and at a point where momentum is picking up like I’ve never known, I guess you could call it the “tipping point”.

Let’s go! I’ve never had it this exciting before y’all , yet scared shitless. Thank you for being there being on the journey with me. I’m ready for it, all of it. Let’s carry on beautifully with the wind in our hair in the fight for our lives! Yee!

THURSDAY. Stayed tuned. Pray I don’t die from exhaustion by then. Lol

I LOVE YOU!

Buffoons, how to be beautiful, Oprah

2010-06-16T06:44:00.000-04:00

Hey sweethearts,

I've been so busy! Fell off my workout plan for a couple of weeks due to stress but now I'm back on my workout plan. Getting into shape for health reasons, but also because I'm planning an upcoming photoshoot for my new website launch. It will be my first real photoshoot complete with makeup artist, hair stylist, fashion stylist, photographer, etc. So I'm trying to get into shape before that happens, hee hee. Thinking of creative ideas for the shoot, have any suggestions? Can't wait, it's going to be super exciting! Stay tuned everybody, get ready. I will also be launching my new webstore and this blog will be really vamped up. Yee!

The topic I wanted to focus on this week is "How to be beautiful". Our society focuses so much on outer beauty defining what is beautiful and what isn't. I learned this week that being beautiful is a feeling we experience. We become beautiful by making others feel beautiful and by doing "beautiful" things.

I realized this when I was at the beach with my good friend Adrian Villa, (one of my beloved gay boyfriends, lol) who is an amazing make-up artist. We met when I first moved to LA from Atlanta, when we both worked as make-up artists at Macy's. Adrian and I went to Venice beach and along the way while sitting in traffic, I saw this buffoon open their car door and place their trash (an aluminum can and a full plastic bag) right there in the road! It didn't occur to the buffoon that there were cars behind them? Even worse, we had to swerve around the trash to get through.

Some of us are so absorbed in our own little world, that the rest of it doesn't exist to us. This buffoon obviously couldn't live with their trash for a little while longer, long enough to make it to a trash can. What a buffoon! lol

After we got to the beach and had a wonderful picnic, I started making my way to the ladies' room. This dude on a bike came sweeping by and ran over my foot with the baby stroller he had attached to the back of the bike. It was one of those strollers you can put the baby in that had wheels, that you can attach to the back of a bike. Dude didn't give a warning, didn't say "behind you", no horn, nothing. Just came crashing into me, running over my bunny foot with his child. His wife even said something, "Honey, watch where you're going". I said, "Yeah, you should let people know that you're coming".

You know what this buffoon said? He goes, "Well, you saw me coming". Or course I was the bigger person and said, "You have a good day, sir." Then I said, "I think you owe me an apology, but whatever", and kept going. If I didn't have to pee so bad, I would have stood there longer to stand my ground. But you have to pick your battles, and this buffoon was not worth my bunny time.

He's just another example of someone who's so absorbed in themselves, completely careless about anything else. I felt sorry for him, you know? That he couldn't accept responsibility for what he did, much less admit he was wrong. That he embarrassed himself further by acting even more like a buffoon with his ignorant comment. I felt sorry for the kid he was raising, and even though the baby was young, he still set an example for his kid without even realizing it. But most of all, I felt sorry for his wife. Because a woman is reflected by the male company she keeps, he made a complete fool out of her too, embarrassing her. I pitied her that she married such a buffoon, much less having his child! lol

If 2012 does hit as some say, it will be because of people like him. And that other littering buffoon. And those people responsible for the oil spill. Why should we get to continue going on the way that we do, when we can't appreciate the world we live in? We contribute to these catastrophes daily by abusing our power. I believe they build up and that's why we have these crazy earthquakes, tsunamis, oil spills, etc. This oil spill is no accident, y'all. All of these occurrences are signs for us to check ourselves.

Although I couldn't make him apologize, I could choose to be beautiful by rising above him instead of stooping to his buffoon level or be tainted by his buffoon ignorance. Being equally ugly would have just made me a bunny buffoon. lol He knew he was wrong. His wife knew he was wrong. The point is, next time you do something that you know you're clearly in the wrong, just step up and say you're sorry instead of blaming it on someone else. Because in the end it just makes you look like a bigger buffoon. lol

I admit, there are so many adversities out there. But isn't that just more reason for us to behave beautifully? To balance things out, if it were possible? We have more power and impact than we know, or give ourselves credit for. Yet some of us abuse that power and choose to be ugly, doing ugly things. I believe that we all have power and you only get more of it when you choose to do good with your power. The folks at Enron abused their power (you saw what happened to them) yet someone like Oprah chose to do good with her power (you see what happened to her! lol). Point made. All I'm saying is, BEAUTY IS A CHOICE. BEING BEAUTIFUL, IS A CHOICE.

I decided recently and shared with my friend Linh, that although I can't control what happens in the world or even what happens to me, I can, however, choose to respond gracefully; behave eloquently, and exist beautifully. That was the revelation I had this month; a promise I made to myself. I'm not going to lie, I have insecurities about my looks just like everyone else. But discovering this lesson and choosing to live "beautifully" was just another way to allow myself to feel beautiful (which is how every woman wants to ultimately feel, right?)

What if, just what if, how we act is really how we feel about ourselves? Selfishness is really a sign of self-insufficiency, isn't it? It means you're so caught up in getting what you don't have enough of within yourself, that you have to be ugly to compensate for that emptiness of what you lack. Clearly, it shows in some people. I once heard a wise man say, that there are two types of people in the world: "Those who come from a place of fear, ego, and scarcity, and those who come from a place of love, abundance, and spirit". (Paraphrased from 177 Mental Toughness Secrets of the World Class by Steve Siebold)

I truly feel sorry for those people who operate from such a low level, because you know what it really means? That they're really in their own prison of fear, ego, and scarcity they've created for themselves that they can't break free from. The saddest thing is they're teaching their families and their children to live in fear, creating that prison for themselves. It's like an ant crawling around in one square area inch constantly searching, attacking other ants for food not realizing the existence of the whole wide world is as big as it is. If only that buffoon ant knew... You have no idea how much I want to set that buffoon ant free! lol *bunny sigh

But seriously folks, part of living beautifully is being rewarded by living freely. I can finally say with where I am right now in life, I feel so free. Sure I have worries, bills, adversities- but my being and spirit (for once) are truly free. If it's anything I wish upon the world (including the buffoons), I wish for all of us to relieve ourselves from the prison we've created and to truly exist and live freely, beautifully. Just imagine how much more we'd all be to ourselves, our families, our communities...

Speaking of living freely, I'm heading down to Laguna Niguel this weekend to audition for Oprah in hopes of getting my own TV show! Several years ago, this psychic told me he had a flash of a vision that I was going to be with Oprah! lol Yah I'm scared, a little nervous, but I have to do it. I'd rather drive down there, camp out overnight and open that unknown door just to rest assured that I opened the damn thing fully, discovering what was behind it. You never know, could be freedom. I'd rather be rejected than be 90, old, and decrepit thinking about the life I never attempted. Whatever the case, I shall bring them my story, what I stand for, and my hopes to use the show as a portal to serve and educate Americans about contemporary art. I hope I have your support America, and Oprah's too. Yeee!

TV shows, and what do you REALLY know about art?

2010-05-21T19:17:00.000-04:00

Hey y'all,

I've just been grinding away like a mad bunny.

Other than that, just slammed finishing up a commission, painting hard to get my submission into New American Paintings since I haven't applied for a few years, working out getting my bunny buns ready for the beach. Hoping to treat myself to get my tattoos finished when I reach my goal weight. Yay, motivational rewards!

It's not even about losing weight or how I look, but more so, being healthy. Just on this quest to be physically, mentally, spiritually healthy.

I applied to be a guest on the Tyra show, to share my story in hopes of getting just one person to value their DIGNITY above all else. So we'll see. Let's just say the more adversity I face, the harder I grind, the bigger I think!

Next time you get really down about something, instead of fantasizing wildly about all the bad stuff that can happen and freaking yourself out, choose to fantasize wildly about all the good stuff that can happen instead. I mean, we all have problems. I know when the little insecure voices show up in our heads, they can really get loud.

So whenever I face some crazy adversity, I just start dreaming wildly about all the possible great things that can happen instead. Sure, I could get evicted if I don't come up with rent, but I'd rather focus on the possibility of getting my own TV show on Oprah's OWN Network instead! And that got me grinding like a mad bunny, hopping hopping hopping.

Basically my proposal would be what I'm trying to do with this blog. To let America and the world know what an artist's life is really like. The trials, adversity, and adventures we face day to day and the triumph of how great it feels with each progressive step.

I mean, think about it. If you ask any highschool or college student who their favorite contemporary visual artist is, would they even be able to name someone? Do people even think about who their favorite artists are? I saw someone tweet today on Twitter that a news anchor mispronounced Banksy's name as Bankski. That's sad. That really is sad that news sources are even so in the dark about contemporary art.

I am passionate about bringing art into America's mainstream. I feel that America is really in the dark as a whole of not only supporting visual art, but even acknowledging it in this country. It's not anyone's fault, it's just what it is. There are no television programs dedicated to contemporary art at all, besides the upcoming "Work of Art" show premiering on Bravo on Wed, June 9th. Super excited about it. Sarah Jessica Parker, Jerry Saltz (art critic, New York Magazine), Jeanne Greenberg Rohatyn (owner of Salon94 gallery), Simon de Pury (art auctioneer) will be the judges, and China Chow (actress & art enthusiast) will be hosting.

And, I happen to know one of the contestants, Trong Nguyen! Emailed him to congratulate him when someone sent me a link to the show and his happy face was on Bravo's website. Go Trong, go Trong! lol Also excited that Jerry Saltz is one of the judges. I had the pleasure of meeting Jerry about four or five years ago when he came to speak at UCLA and he was so nice. He gave me his card and I emailed him, surprised that he actually wrote back with some really constructive criticism. And he was so friendly when I sprung a big bunny hug on him the last time I saw him in NY years ago. So I'm super excited about this show, and the hardworking contestants, so happy that Sarah Jessica Parker took some damn initiative in seeing what America is missing!

I would want my show to not be a competition, but an explorative portal into artworld. We're gonna start doing it guerrilla style here on my blog through YouTube. I just want y'all to be a part of this exciting thing called the art world that seems so mysterious, even to those of us that are in it. It seems intimidating. Folks think you have to have a lot of money to buy art. WRONG. You can acquire original pieces at student shows, charity art auctions, etc.

One auction I am a big advocate of is the one for ART PAPERS Magazine. As stated on their website, "ART PAPERS is a non-profit organization dedicated to the examination, development, and definition of art and culture in the world today. Its mission is to provide an independent and accessible forum for the exchange of perspectives on the role of contemporary art as a socially relevant and engaged discourse. This mission is implemented through the publication of ART PAPERS Magazine and the presentation of public programs."

The point is, you don't have to have a lot of money to buy original art. I remember when I started donating eight years ago, a watercolor retailing for $150 sold for $50. Now, that watercolor is worth approximately $650. I haven't donated in the last few years, but will donate at the next one. The point is, you can totally buy original art for the same cost you would spend on a pair of shoes. So no excuses! Plus, the art will last a lifetime for you and your family legacy. Those shoes won't. Would what you rather have for $50?

Don't get me wrong. I am not an advocate for buying art simply because of the name or because you think it will appreciate in value down the line. I am an advocate for buying art because you truly love it. Because every time you see it, it makes you happy. It inspires you. Or for my collector that had cancer, it comforts you and brings you strength and hope. Whatever your reason, buy it as a cultural investment for yourself, as a "feel-good" investment, as I call it. Don't ever ever buy art expecting it to appreciate in value. Sure, if an artist's career blows up, then that's just icing on the cake. Even then, would you be willing to part with it? It is, after all, an original. Meaning, there is none other like it in the world (just like the brilliance of your life).

Music, fashion, and cooking have been at the forefront of America's creative expression. However, turn on the TV and any art show you do see only features dead people. Do you really wanna keep seeing dead people? Wouldn't you rather see art that is available to you in your local community? Folks, there are talented artists all around you. Most of all, you don't have to buy expensive art to make great art valid. •Ah ha moment

Slowly easing into it, starting the next few weeks. I'm really excited about it. So do check back.

Again, I want y'all to come with me as we do this art thing together. I want to share with you the difference between low brow and high brow art. To have interviews with artists, collectors, curators, critics, gallerists, and others I've been fortunate enough to know and have worked with so you can see what the art world is really made up of, and how it runs. What is outsider art? Also, how can you incorporate art into you and your family's lives (on a budget)? Hell, I might even consider giving a little painting lesson here and there for you and your kids.

You know how some of y'all go into a gallery and you see this piece of art that you just don't understand? And you think, "I can do that, why is it $100k?" That's exactly what I'm talking about Willis. We're gonna share with you the reasoning behind the value of an artist's work, concept and theory, and exactly why that piece of art is $100k. Aren't you curious?

Be EXCITED, I am! I really hope I can impact an awareness of contemporary art in America today, and eventually create an awareness of international art for Americans. One thing I'm very passionate about is the rise of my fellow Chinese sisters in China, doing their art thing. While I am excited that Chinese artists have really put themselves on the map in the last 20 years, I'm more excited to shed light on the female Chinese artists that are busting it hard now. So that's just one of the things I hope to explore.

Yee! Well that's it for now folks, gotta go skipping (it's my new exercise). I think skipping makes you happier, it's not as hard on your knees and boobs as jogging, it's not as boring, and it rubs off on other people too when they drive by, smiling and honking. And the cardiovascular workout is just as intense, depending on how high you skip.

Have a great weekend lovelies!

The JOURNEY- lions, emperors, unknown doors, and flying deer

2010-05-08T07:20:00.000-04:00

Sitting here listening to violin concertos. I missed you guys, and feel bad I haven't been disciplined enough to get to y'all every week like I wanted to. But things are really on a roll. Yesterday I got some really big news, can't announce it yet but this summer is gonna be really exciting.

What's been on my mind lately is the journey of an artist (visual, musician, writer, etc.) Our paths are so similar, as we progress forward on this journey. Which is why I wanted to share a story my mom told me when I was younger that has stuck with me all my life. When I get scared or fearful or doubtful, I think of this story and know exactly what to do. Of course she Asianized it so bear with me... lol

Once upon a time, there was a strong and powerful emperor. *Chinese music and gongs* He captured a brave warrior from the opposing forces. The emperor gave the warrior two choices. Behind door #1 was a lion. If he picks that door, he'll get eaten by the lion, a sure thing. Behind door #2, was unknown. The emperor asked the warrior to promptly choose. The warrior, without hesitation, chose door #1. The emperor then shook his head in disappointment. The warrior asked, "Why do you shake your head, emperor?" The emperor berated, "You are a brave warrior, but I am so disappointed because you would rather get eaten by a lion than open an unknown door." The warrior asked, "Well what was behind the unknown door?" The emperor replied, "Well, I was going to grant you your freedom to return to your homeland, to be with your wife and children, but you were so afraid to open the unknown door that you'd rather be eaten by a lion". And so, the warrior was devoured by the ravenous lion. *Gong!

How many of us out there are choosing to be eaten by the lion because we're too scared to open that unknown door? How many of us are being devoured by remaining in our comfort zones, decaying in an illusion of what we think is stability? If opening an unknown door really does lead to freedom, then are we opening every door that is available to us? Don't we owe it to ourselves to open every door presented to us; isn't that what carpe diem is all about?

I just see so many people stuck in this illusion of stability (which admittedly, I also crave to find). I faced a big adversity recently, which is why I haven't blogged much lately. Not gonna go into details, but let's just say it was a state of emergency and every single little bunny hair was on high alert. You know how skunks are so aware of their environment when they hear the slightest noise they suddenly scram away? Well let's just say I was in extreme high alert skunk mode. lol It was a situation where I had to perform and come up with results in a very short amount of time. My mentors from financial world taught me it's not how much you try, but whether you can deliver great results. So I had to step up my game.

There was an incident that I remember, where fear completely took over and consumed me. I remember praying hard that night to whoever was up there watching over me, that if I jumped into this art thing whole-heartedly, to please catch me and not let me fall. I could run back to my hole and not pursue this art thing full time, and get a job, or I could floor this thing and get to the next level to gain the momentum that I needed.

In being true to the purpose of this blog, which is to share with you what's really going on, I gotta be honest. While I'm proud to be making a full-time living as a professional artist, with the recent transition leaving job world, I can't say it's all smooth sailing yet.

A friend recently said, "Yun you've had quite a 'colorful' life". When I thought about it, it's true. Who would have ever thought that a Chinese immigrant / ex-stripper could have the support and the brilliant team that's working with me now? That I can make a full-time living making paintings out of porn to empower women that we are truly flowers, to be represented by galleries nation-wide, be reviewed, and show internationally? And, actually be respected and taken seriously by the the art community? Really? Would you have believed it if someone told you that?!

While I can't say I've "made it" yet, I'm definitely doing it. Doing it hard, too. lol As a visual artist who sympathizes with musicians, writers, actors, etc., I fully understand the struggles we face in the pursuit of our dreams. I see so many rappers, singers, pimping their CD's on Venice beach, at the Chinese Theater in Hollywood promoting to all the tourists, selling stuff out of their trunks. I so respect that. And writers, my goodness, submitting your material to publishers to get published, same thing. Even actors, actresses, screenwriters, directors, anyone that has a dream that's creative, we all struggle. We do. We grind. I can't say that creatives have really ever had it easy even, as a whole.

Even in history, the stigma is that of the "starving artist". I mean, one day you'll be using your laundry quarters to scrape up something off the dollar menu (Carl's Jr. has the best dollar burgers, especially their ranch bacon cheeseburger, followed by McDonald's chicken sandwich, then Wendy's chili and their chicken sandwiches are ok, surveyed through frequent experience, lol) and the next day you're drinking Dom Perignon with a collector, meeting God knows who you never imagined. There was one time when I was stuck at the gas station with no gas and a friend had to drop by and lend me $13 so I could get home. There's also been times where I got to meet brilliant artists like John Baldessari, Barbara Kruger, and Orlan . To have the privilege of being in their presence even, was life-changing. To have Orlan and Barbara Kruger ask me what my name was? And to have Orlan tell me "I'll remember you, Yun Bai" was such a big deal. Or meeting Hans-Ulrich Obrist, one of the most prominent curator/critics in the world.

The point I'm making is that the life of an artist is very "colorful', indeed. It can be extreme. One minute you're facing the perils of survival, the next minute you actually get to coast; sometimes finding yourself in the company of people you never thought you'd be in the presence of. Every penny you have goes back into your art. I heard a photographer once say, "My camera eats more than I get to eat". Then another day, like yesterday, I got an email from something I'd submitted to months ago that said "Hi Yun! I was looking through all the thousands of submissions and I found yours! I really LOVE your porn flowers!" followed by an offer I couldn't refuse for a very lucrative opportunity, beyond my wildest dreams.

Albert Einstein said, "There are only two ways to live your life: as though nothing is a miracle, or as though everything is a miracle." I used to live as though nothing was a miracle; going about life on autopilot, going to my 9-5, or working the three part-time jobs I had at any given time. I felt like a mouse on a hamster wheel; running running running, but going nowhere. I mean, when you have eight W-2's in one year, something is wrong. lol I realized that I wasn't employable. It wasn't that I would get fired, but more so that I would get bored and quit. After realizing what a run-around I'd created for myself, I made the decision to really step it up and do this art thing full-time. In doing so, I now expect miracles, and for some reason, they come. ? *confused bunny shrug

It's something we as artists have to be honest with ourselves, it's a real commitment that we have to be absolutely committed to. I mean, if you're not "in it to win it" as they say on American Idol, and be truly committed to being an artist for the next 20, 30, 40 years, then forget it. Like hip hop and rock n'roll, being a creative is a way of life. It's how we live, who we are, therefore how we exist.

In making this commitment to open the unknown door, I left everything I'd believed to be "stability", behind. I left my parents in Atlanta five years ago while they're still able to get around and be in mediocre health, to come out to LA and really fight for the three of us. Even though I'm their only daughter, I'm also their son.

It was scary to leave. My mom was scared for me the most- single girl, moving cross-country by myself, I can see how she would be concerned (especially when a convicted rapist raped and killed a woman, then stuffed her in her car trunk, and dropped her off 500 ft. from my apartment my first week in LA). When things got hard, she would suggest that I get a job or go back to Atlanta, because she loved me and didn't want to see me struggle the way I was struggling. We would have endless screaming matches of me refusing to go home, refusing to go get a job because I was 100% committed to this art thing. There have been times when I was really between a hard rock and a hard place, instances where my dignity would be compromised if I wasn't true to myself. Moving back to Atlanta and living at home would have been easy. Getting a job would have been easy. But I decided to really stay true to the commitment I'd made to myself, so I decided to floor this shit.

By flooring it, I swung open that unknown door, and truly found the freedom and the stability I craved for so long. After learning that I could depend on myself to make miracles happen and create amazing results, I just went with it. To justify to my mom that getting a job was a no-go, I explained it to her this way: being that my expenses are about $2000/mo, and even if I got a full-time job working forty hours per week at $10/hr (being conservative), that's still only maybe $1200 after taxes. Which means I'd have to get a side job, taking up another 20-30 hours per week, just to cover my expenses. The opportunity cost was too high- who has time or energy to work on their art after a 70-80 hour workweek? Really? Or better yet, what kind of crappy art would I be producing if I put my he(art) as second priority, second to an 80 hour workweek?

Even though I knew she was just trying to help the best way she could, I knew in my heart it just wasn't the way to go. Although I remember going to bed that night completely afraid while weighing my options, I knew that I could do it. The next day, I landed close to $2000 with 2 phone calls landing a commission and selling work direct. And how long did it take to make those two phone calls? An hour. Seriously. Granted, we're not counting the time it takes to make the work, but you get the idea.

After that day, I knew I could fly. I knew it. And no one could talk me out of it or make me believe otherwise. No one could suck me back into the fear they had projected onto me. I finally found stability- in myself. I finally trusted myself. And in discovering that conviction, I discovered freedom.

Of course the unknown is a thick fog. A thick, thick, opaque fog. Often we are so afraid to let go of what we don't want than to have the courage to seek out what we do want. It's not really being true to ourselves, is it? To know what that super-action hero or heroine version of us looks like, acts like, talks like, walks like, but afraid to ever become that person for ourselves, simply because it's safer and easier not to. Not even giving ourselves a chance- but instead remaining comforted by a lion that slowly devours us as we continually lie to ourselves that the lion is stability, when it's really decay.

Which brings me to the story of the deer (it's a story, so don't quote me on whether it's factual, lol). I heard somewhere that when a deer gets hit by a car, it doesn't get hit running across the road. It gets hit when it's distracted by the headlights (an adversity) and in that moment of hesitation, whether it should run back or not. That's when the deer gets hit- when it starts to run back.

I made a commitment to myself to be like a deer, to spring forward laser-focused, with no time for hesitation to be hit by adversity. I wondered, if deer could fantasize about the super-action hero version of themselves, would they pursue becoming that magical deer who can fly? If deer could ultimately trust themselves in knowing that springing forward through the road meant opening unknown doors to survival and ultimate freedom, would they run forward with more conviction? Would you?

Musicians, this crusty Hulk looking dude really inspired me today... LOL!

2010-03-22T18:24:00.001-04:00

Emerging musicians please read:

It is completely unefficient and rude to blast people's MySpace pages with your videos/music players that play automatically when anyone goes to that person's profile. It's bad enough to spam people's comment pages, but at least give people the choice to hit play if they want to instead of blaring your rock, rap, whatever right when anyone goes to their page- in this case, mine. It's like blasting a boombox right infront of someone's front door. Better yet, don't blast your music to other people's pages at all. I don't, and I have more going on now than ever. I make connections quickly and easily that blossom into meaningful collaborations, without having to spam people's pages.

Musicians ask yourselves - do you want people to hear your music and appreciate you as a musician or do you want people to categorize and associate you as a spammer? And hit the "spam" button so all your efforts in posting your hundreds of videos on people's pages to go DIRECTLY to their spam folder? Isn't that just a waste of time? Wouldn't you rather be playing music?

One of the things I learned and try to do is associate myself with pleasure - to be a source of joy and pleasure for people. To bring value, resources, sales leads, encouragement, ideas, friendship, sometimes even telling it like it is when you have to; I try to contribute whenever I can, as much as I am able. When you build a real friendship / relationship with someone, connecting and networking is so smooth it just comes easily and naturally. Because you are a real ally and your friends are your real allies. In fact, you know them so well you know their work background, what their company does, who their company serves, what they need in order to get to the next level, and in fact, you know their product and services so well that you are a walking mouthpiece on their behalf. That's a real connection. That's you being a real ally. And in turn, they will do the same for you. Instead of spamming hundreds and thousands of people that will get your ass blocked or sent to the spam folder, wouldn't it make sense to connect with, say, 15 key people that you meet online and build real connections with so they can distribute your album, get you a huge show somewhere so you can be heard by thousands, or possibly getting your song on the radio?

I feel that for all of us artists, including visual artists as well, that a lot of us are completely clueless about how to approach people to talk about your work. I know, it's intimidating and it's hard to talk to people and reach out, it seems weird and out of the ordinary, because it is. The majority makes the same excuse to not invest the time, get out of their comfort zones to meet people, and build meaningful relationships with people. But they do invest their time to blast thousands, only to end up in the spam bin. All I'm saying is, not only do you have to invest time in networking, but you have to invest in marketing the right way.

The first step is investing the time and some books into basic networking through books, magazine articles, a mentor, etc. My favorite networking books are Little Black Book Of Connections by Jeffrey Gitomer, and The Networking Survival Guide by Diane Darling. Read them both and you will be good to go. And just use common sense. Ask yourself, "Would I be annoyed with this if I received this?"

Now, some entertainment. Because I am a classy and merciful bunny, I will spare further embarrassment upon this musician (because Lord knows he is severely embarrassing himself plenty) out there blasting himself to earth's end on our MySpace pages. I was on the phone with someone who was like, "Yeah you have a rock song playing on your profile" when I realized that someone's song is playing automatically when anyone goes to my page! So I went to my profile page, myspace.com/yunbaiart, and there was this song just blasting and I had to scroll through to figure out which dude it was, then delete his comment. All I could think of was, "You fucker, you ass!" lol The point is, I didn't listen to his music. I didn't want to listen to his music. He and his music went straight to the trash.

So back to this fool that just makes all rock people look bad. LOL I love rock y'all don't get me wrong but this one fool I will spare him, his poor Hulk looking ass, replies to me with the following after I made it clear that I didn't appreciate him spamming my page with his music and that it wasn't an efficient marketing tool. Hell it's my page, I'm allowed to defend my turf if Mr. Hulk is stepping on my bunny paw. lol So Mr. Hulk replies, "Shut the fuck up. You're the only bitch taking the time to complain. blah blah blah".

LOL!!! Classy. He is gonna get far. Maybe that's why he is jobless, as he notes this on his website. Musicians, this is not the way to go. Your music could be great but if you're like this, no one will want to work with you. The spamming of people's MySpace pages is not the way to go either. Building relationships with people on MySpace that you can work with in win-win collaborations that could increase your exposure to a wider audience is a different story.

Thanks Mr. Hulk, your ignorance has inspired me to serve and provide resources to my friends in hopes of enhancing what they're doing yet once again. Good job!

My first gay porn tree / cactus thingy - exploring "Humanism in Contemporary Sexuality"

2010-03-17T23:15:00.000-04:00

Y'all I am trying my best to blog more frequently, folks have told me they love reading my posts and it really means a lot. Thanks for being with me on this exciting art ride. Nothing much happening this week, just working my ass off. A year and a half of catching up to do since I sort of fell off, so just doing lots of maintenance stuff.

But definitely getting out there more and you will see me more, out and about. I'm going to my friend Patrick Bowsher's concert this weekend, Sat. March 20th, 9pm. 1348 14th St, Santa Monica 90404. Patrick does different kinds of music but I love his experimental jazz. He will also play some of his rock stuff. Lineup is: 9pm, Atomik Kangaroo, 10pm Patrick Bowsher, 11pm Sure Shot Rockers, 12am Lloyd London. I'm looking forward to expanding my ear's horizons. The only reason I seem cool is cuz my friends give me a freaking clue about what's going out there in the world. lol I'm actually a little shy sometimes and I sort of have a self-diagnosed agoraphobia thing going on. So this will be fun!

I'm also supposed to get together with my homeboy Donovan B who introduced me to Dr. Michael Beckwith's Agape Spiritual Center so I'm gonna go check that out for the first time on Sunday as well. I totally need some spirituality, I just feel so crispy, crunchy, and crusty! LOL You know, like your soul is ashy or something. My soul just feels dry, I feel like an ashy Asian. lol You know what I'm talking about. *Wink

I'm supposed to get together with my collector Steve Kramer to explore gay sex world, since he commissioned me to do my first gay porn tree / cactus thingy. I told him the only way I would do it is if there was real legitimate critical theory behind why I did it. Ritual and process is important in my work, so I wanted to really be true to my craft. I mean, it's easy to slap some penises on some wood and make a cactus out of it. LOL But I really want to explore the reality of "Humanism in Contemporary Sexuality" through real research, interviewing, and observations. Cool thing is, Steve has never been to a straight strip club (why would he, he is gay) so he will be also doing that with me as well. It will be fun, I'm super excited about it now that Micky's is reopen! www.mickys.com
This place totally made me blush the first time my friend Laura took me there. All I remember was that there were lots of pink, animal print, muscles, thongs, and asses in my face. LOL! So I'm sure it will be exciting for Steve to get a lapdance from a stripper too. Will keep you posted.

The reason I decided to further explore "Humanism in Contemporary Sexuality" derives from a lecture I attended while in college at Spelman almost a decade ago (I attended Agnes Scott, the lecture was at Spelman). Gloria Steinem was there, I was so inspired. She basically said that in order to be humanist and fight for equal human rights, you have to also support women and therefore, be a feminist. And that we needed more men to support the women's movement. I couldn't agree more. I remember it as if it was yesterday. It was fascinating, inspiring, and impactful to me, leaving a strong message seen in my work. And, I even had the chance to meet Pearl Cleage too! I was surprised I even had the nerve to go up and seek her out and say hello as she sat in the audience. Pearl Cleage!! So yes, that's exactly where I'm coming from. I have to thoroughly do research and explore it across all gender roles and see what kind of revelations I get. Will keep you posted of the adventures! I think maybe Steve and I will go to Micky's then go to a straight strip club after we hit a few art openings. Should be really fun! Will tweet and post pics. Can't wait!

So that's it for now y'all lots of adventures I can't talk about yet, but stay tuned next week, should have some fun reports....hee yeee hee Have a great weekend lovelies!

Houston group show, being touched, making people cry, Twitter excitement

2010-03-07T15:27:00.000-05:00

Folks, thanks so much for all your support and patience with me this past year. I can say that I'm officially back from hell. Hell was fun. lol All I know is, after you come out of the fog, mostly everything seems unbelievably clear though some things still seem muddy.

My show at New Gallery in Houston ends on March 20th. Go check it out if you are in the area (www.newgallery.net). So a few weeks ago, after my show opened, I called the gallery to see if we'd sold anything. Nearly a year or so ago, this sweet lady who was battling ovarian cancer (she was already in her 70's) bought a porn flower diptych. I spoke to her briefly shortly after she bought the diptych to thank her, and told her what the flowers meant to me - that they stood for hope and healing, serving as a good omen against adversity. Unfortunately, I didn't keep up with her to see how she was doing. When I called the gallery, Thom my gallerist told me one of her friends had come by to deliver the message that she wasn't doing well, that she was in her last days. I was sad and just hoped she wasn't in a lot of pain. When a patient has cancer, they are usually in a lot of pain. I hope she was comfortable, that she was surrounded by loved ones.

But here's what really tore me up: she made sure to have the diptych by her side, so she could be near it in her last few days. I can't imagine being in your last days, knowing you're going to die, that you can't take anything with you, yet being surrounded by your loved ones and all the material things you've ever loved. When are you ok to release it all and let go? How do you blink your eyes one more time to see the life you've lived only to close them finally, and forever? I cried a lot that day when I found out. I cried that I'd never had the pleasure of meeting her in person, or took the time to say more comforting words to her. I suppose I'm happy with the comfort and peace the flowers were able to provide for her. Just never thought a stranger I've never met, could be moved so much by something I made. The whole incident made me realize in one quick second, what life was about. It was as if time slowed down, and all I felt was this overwhelming clarity. Whatever anger I had with the art world, whatever frustrations I had with people that screwed me, my bills, my concern for my parents, all fell into the background. Nothing else mattered. This mattered. Just this.

I was happy that I made an impact. That was what made me cry the most. For once I didn't have regret, or doubt- I felt I had done the right thing by telling her that the flowers are flowers of strength, hope, and healing. That something beautiful will come out of this situation that seems so ugly and unappealing. Just like how most people would view pornography as exploitative and vulgar, yet once transformed into flowers they blossom with new meaning. Just like how I was labeled a whore for choosing not to sleep with men for money, yet exactly like how I stayed true to myself and got out, only to triumph as a professional artist. I know my collector understood. Perhaps that's what she was reminded of whenever she looked at the diptych. Perhaps every time she looked at my art, it strengthened her that something good was going to come out of this seemingly bad situation....I hope so. I was so touched to hear this, making me realize that this same feeling perhaps, is how she felt when she acquired the flowers. Perhaps she was moved by my art, just as much as I was moved by her strength, optimism, eccentricity, and spunk. I mean, she's gotta be pretty cool to be in her 70's and buy flower paintings made of porn, you know? lol

I remember sitting down with one of my attorney mentors (shotout to Arai "Mitch" Mitchell) and he said, "Yun, I want you to make great art that will make people cry". I've heard of people fainting and falling down the stairs and even breaking a leg when they saw the Nike of Samothrace aka "The Winged Victory" at the Louvre, but to make people cry when they saw my art? To make them speechless? How do you do that, exactly? That's what I gotta figure out. How do you communicate all that, at once? And we're not talking shock value either. lol That's easy to do. But to "make great art that will make people cry"? Maybe Mitch was referring to how I felt when I heard how my work affected my collector, or how she felt every time she looked at the diptych. An intense, overwhelming feeling of all things good - all that you feel when you cry tears of joy. I should try to bring forth those emotions through my paintings? I mean, I was there. I felt it. It's been such a long while since I've had that elated feeling. Maybe that's what I have to convey through my art. Pure elation, and all that goes with it. Yea.

Speaking of being elated, this Twitter thing has been pretty interesting. I only have 92 followers so far since I just started my Twitter account not too long ago, but it's awfully humbling to have all those followers, really. I mean, these people actually think my art, what I'm doing, and what I'm saying is unique. It's really inspiring to have Busta Rhymes, Swizz Beatz, and Kid Cudi be into what you're doing. Hee hee, it was really motivating! I remember when I was back in ATL and went to Emory to go see Busta perform. It was a free concert and being the broke stripper college kid that I was, I couldn't miss this show. I know, not such a big deal to some folks, but I was just glad that people are starting to be aware that I exist. I've always known that the reason I'm not where I want to be is because the world doesn't know that I exist. But it really put a bunny smile on my face that I'm doing something right with this art thing, that little baby steps like having people follow you on Twitter does make a difference. All those little baby steps will eventually grow into big giant leaps of momentum, and hopefully, it will be able to run on its' own.

Yup, pure elation, and all that goes with it...just like what Martin Lawrence says about life: "Ride this motherfucker til the wheels fall off!"

Awesome art panel at Angles Gallery, I'm scared shitless, and "What if"

2010-02-12T07:03:00.000-05:00

Hey y'all. My art pal Steve Wolkoff and I went to this awesome art panel moderated by Marc Richards, with Dean Valentine and Sarah Watson from L&M Arts as panelists at Angles last night. Let me just say, WOW. Not so much to what was discussed, but just the fact that I was sitting five feet from the Rubells was inspiring (I guess they were visiting from Miami?) It was like my moments when I met Barbara Kruger, Orlan, and John Baldessari. Surreal, and beyond belief! Being one to always be out of my comfort zone, I worked up the balls to ask a question and made a comment that was relevant to what was being discussed. Then I worked up the balls to introduce myself to Dean Valentine and shook his hand. Yee! If you don't know who these people are that I'm talking about, it's best to Google them. Mr. Marc Richards and another collector was nice enough to exchange cards with me, it was sooo exciting. And I exchanged a few words with Ms. Sarah Watson, who was super classy, super nice. I think part of success is letting the world know you exist. Walking away last night, at least they know that I exist.

Lots have happened. Lots of good things. But I'm scared shitless of what's coming ahead. And clearly there is more demand than I can handle at this point. Ok so I just wanna reiterate the mission of this blog is to share with you everything that this art journey entails as we go through it together, so you can see what art life is about. As my reader, whether supportive or not, please expect that not everything is going to be roses all the time. I realize the more successful I get, the more criticism, judgment, and objectification I will face. That's part of the game, right?

Aside from most of my work being sold and making new work, just preparing myself mentally for the adversity that will come. You gotta expect it. I'm just unclear how to embrace it. I gotta admit: I am scared shitless that starting next month, it will officially be the start of my two year period to "make it". Meaning, I have to secure enough money at the end of the two year period so mom doesn't have to go back to work - ever. It's already hard on her to take care of my dad full-time. Not to mention dad has to have eye surgery next month also. It's not major, doctors said it's a minor surgery, but I feel awful I won't be able to be there to comfort him.

I'm gonna start incorporating graphs, statistics (I'm a sucker for data) concerning the baby boomers in America and their health care, into my porn flowers. Because it is personal. And I'm not the only one. America will be a country of impoverished old people, and it's already starting to happen. You see 80, 90 year-olds working at McDonald's, Wal-Mart, or as "security" at the bank. You see them working the graveyard shift at the gas station. Fact is, they won't be able to retire. Many have come out of retirement because they can't afford to retire. Others will work until they die. What happens is, their families take care of them, then our system. Imagine 76 million baby boomers retiring within a 10-15 year period, the majority of them unprepared for retirement, and if they are not able to work, and their families aren't able to take care of them, what that will do to our taxes as a country, even worse the homeless rate will increase dramatically. Be aware and take notice: you will see the elderly become homeless more and more. They aren't druggies. They're not mentally ill. They're just too old for the labor force, and don't have families to take care of them, and the government aide they apply for isn't enough. The more I am aware of this, the more I'm scared shitless - for my parents, for us as a nation.

Just getting mentally prepared for the chaos that's to come. Had to face some wolves already, thank God my awesome attorney is there to protect me from them. Honestly, you wanna know a real confession? And don't dismiss it as small. It's really a concern. Aside from my fear that I'm not gonna make it and my parents are gonna end up homeless, I'm completely horrified of my first bad review. Ok, laugh. It may seem small to you, but just the thought of pouring your heart out to the best art you can make and then have it displayed for the world to judge and critique, comment on, write reviews whether it was good or not, is daunting. I've never been horrified of reviews, until recently. So far I've been fortunate to have all positive reviews, and one so-so one, but not a flat out bad one. *Gulp* Honestly, just being real here, I am scared shitless the critics will rip my next solo apart. What if I get completely ripped apart? It's their job to be completely honest, sharing their educated opinion to the public. They wouldn't be such great critics if it wasn't for their great critical writing, views, and opinions. They owe the public a real honest opinion of what great work is, which includes qualifying everything they see and making commentary about it. Their mission is to serve the public, in a way. Of course I want brutal honesty; it can only help you grow. But I really am scared shitless of my first bad review. Ok, continue laughing. I know, it won't matter 10 or 20 years from now, but it's really causing me anxiety. Don't take it personal, right? (lol, nervously).

What if I don't make it and mom has to go back to work? What if they become homeless? What if my dream of being reviewed in the LA Times ends in complete humiliation? What if the public doesn't understand my work? What if nothing sells from my show? What if I never lose the freshman 30 I gained from a decade ago and remain chubby forever, unable to wear latex ever again? (lol, gotcha.)

No, seriously. Glad I'm back from my stupor since March 2008, when I fell off the face of the earth due to some unfortunate business dealings that left me shocked and rattled. Besides the Chinese Character Biennial and a few group shows here and there and selling work, I haven't had a solo since March 2008.

I'm scared, world. I'm scared shitless. I can only want this art thing bad and do the best I can. I believe one's life will have several major adversities throughout one's lifetime - whether it's a divorce, a death of someone close, getting screwed from bad business dealings, financial loss, whatever- an average person will go through a few major adversities throughout their life. Well I guess I gotta embrace this second major life challenge, huh?

If it's one thing I discovered for myself when I stripped through college and mom had cancer causing my parents to go bankrupt, it's the sense of stability I found. Ironic, I know, but when all you have left is faith and the virtue of kindness, that's all you need (not to mention that's all you have to work with). Maybe I'm just a cheesy Southern gal, but it's true. I faced what seemed like death, in the face. It's like that again now. And it will probably happen again in the future (Donald Trump says to "expect problems"). I know I handled it once and came out on top. Sure I was proud I got to graduate with my class on time, but more proud that I didn't get sucked into a world of prostitution and drug addiction. Looking back, I would never compromise my dignity like that again.

So this is the point. What I'm about to go through the next couple of years is truly going to be the biggest challenge of my life, as of yet. Being 30 and all, I can't even start thinking about finding a man, or having kids, until my parents' financial situation is secured. I'm going to need your help, my lovelies! My biological clock is ticking! lol I am completely scared, but after voicing my concern with Mat Gleason tonight about my fear of my first awful review, I feel a lot better. He prepped me that it shouldn't really affect anything, if it happens.

So now that my studio is pretty much cleaned out of inventory except for a few pieces here and there, it's time to start painting. I've started working on some pieces and just making inventory. A little overwhelmed - between selling your art, getting reps and galleries to sell your art, making more art to fulfill demand, and getting into merchandising / art licensing, it's all so crazy.

Thanks Mat Gleason for getting me out of my negative mind-boggle! The questions I should be asking: What if I do make it? What if I make it big and do end up coming up with my parents' retirement? What if I get a fantastic review in the LA Times? What if I get Larry Flynt to sponsor me and give me all the free porn magazines I need? What if I get into the Whitney Biennial in 2012? What if Charles Saatchi knew that I exist? What if I get my first museum acquisition? What if Madonna buys my art? What if Benedikt Taschen publishes my work in one of his books? What if I lose thirty pounds and will be able to strut my latex again?! Yeee! Do you think Stacy London would object? Probably, huh? lol

Yeeee!

ATL, here I come again

2010-01-25T02:05:00.000-05:00

I wouldn't say that I am moving back home, but I do miss Atlanta a lot, and California is not the friendliest state for businesses. I did some research and it makes a lot of sense for me to base headquarters out of Atlanta. So I'm gonna look more into it. This is very exciting! ATL represent! Can't wait to go home and eat some ribs. Uh huh....catfish and crawfish too! Plus I just miss the Southern life. And will just have to establish a smaller satellite office out here in LA.

Not much to tell you, just super busy reading, learning. Just finished reading Timothy Ferriss' book, "The 4 Hour Work Week". Very progressive, efficient thinking, enjoyed it a lot. The world is so amazing, there is just simply so much to learn! Almost as if your world changes instantly into a different existence with every new thing you learn.

New music coming to website...stay tuned!

2010-01-12T06:32:00.000-05:00

Hey y'all. I've been working my little bunny brain on all kinds of influences, developing ideas. Been reading Richard Branson's "Losing My Virginity" for inspiration. LOL. Dude was wild. Dude was a freak. I can't wait to meet him one day. Hee hee.

Hanging out with emerging hip-hop artists and other musicians for collaborations with my website. It's exciting! I'm listening to a new song now, it's hott. If you like hip-hop I hope you'll like this next song. I decided to continue collaborating with emerging musicians to support and help promote their music. We will have some free downloads available, and certain downloads will be available for download, 100% going to charity based on the musician's choice. I believe in giving back and music has always inspired my art so it seems only natural for me to collaborate with musicians. This is a cool way for us all to win and love. I am personally excited to see what charities the different musicians will choose. I plan on changing the song at least once per quarter, then maybe eventually once every two months. But then again I'm damn busy and this last song by DJ Rilla has been on here for almost two years. LOL

Shot out to DJ Rilla. Y'all make sure to go visit his website to see what he's been up to. We hung out the other day, as eclectic as he is (a true compliment), his music is truly outstanding to me. He'll put anything on, he'll just start playing something, and the shit sounds good. You're really bumping to it.

So that's all for now y'all. I have lots of tricks up my sleeves. Stay tuned. I'm only letting little tidbits out because you have no idea what kind of crazy shit we have planned for 2010. I am really glad I decided to read Branson's book to "set the tone" before I dove into my business plan. Yeee!

Happy New Year! I am a freak

2010-01-01T14:45:00.001-05:00

Happy new year! I hope everyone got home safely and didn't get arrested. The lesbian witch party was fun, there was this amazing hummus and this awesome Greek spread - grape leaves, feta cheese and olives, hm....it was all so good.

I'm such a freak, so motivated about this year. After I left the lesbian party I went to another house party, coming home at 6am. It's 12:17pm now, and I've been up working on my business plan ever since I came home. I don't know, I'm just so focused and motivated! It's gonna be such an amazing year.

Didn't do much the night before last. I got a copy of "Sweet Home Alabama" for $2.99 at the video rental store, I couldn't resist. That movie is a total chic flick but I just love it because it really is accurate of the deep South like Alabama. I grew up in Tallahassee and I just miss it. I miss it a lot. I guess I was just reminiscing. After watching the movie, I started a new porn flower painting and listened to Dolly Parton's greatest hits. lol I just needed to get my Southern back. I swear, you'd think I lost it. It's gonna be good when I head back to the ATL again. I miss my parents, crawfish, and men who open doors. (They don't have those out here in Califiornia!) lol

I saw a ho ...

2009-12-28T01:47:00.000-05:00

Ok so I totally looked up the correct spelling of both "hoe" and "ho" to see which one pointed towards "prostitute" but it didn't come up at dictionary.com so I hope I used the right word.

It was quite strange. It was late, say midnight and I was walking Bebe (my new adopted dog) when I really shouldn't have. I live on this stretch of a pretty seedy road known for its prostitutes. Ironic, even when I am fully dressed in a long skirt out walking my dog, I've had cars stop asking me, "Date, date?" So what I'm saying is, if you are a woman walking up and down this street, you might get hollered at because men think you're a ho for hire. So back to the story. I saw this girl, she was definitely for hire (you can tell by how they walk, it's that "look at me" walk.) This car pulls up further down the road; she's smart, she doesn't walk over. So the car comes back, and she jumps in. Then they drive off. And then the night was clear, quiet, and cold; innocent as day.

Except of course I was standing there, feeling like a third wheel. LOL I mean, you know! Not that I wanted to join in with the prostitute and her John or anything, but the fact that I witnessed it, was just a little weird when all I really wanted to do was walk the dog.

But as soon as I crossed the street, all I could do was think about this girl. I just felt for her. Wondering "Man, that girl must have balls to just get in some dude's car like that". I didn't see a pimp around or anything, I wonder if she worked as an independent. Or really, why she was doing it. Was she doing it because of reasons like why I did what I did back in the day? I never slept with men for money. But the point is, we had a connection. But it just made me really curious what she was doing it for. What were her reasons? You know, writing this I realize, she may be just some street whore according to what I saw; and I was just some college girl stripper--but our reasons, and every woman out there that works in the sex industry has their reasons. All the reasons are VALID. Nobody can deny the validity of these reasons. Whether its for college, to support kids, a drug habit,whatever. But the yearning, and the intensity of that common goal of financial reward is the same.

So this brings us to ponder.... if such intensity for something exists so fervently, can you punish the means of how it's acquired? If a woman is in dire straits to feed her children, must we judge her in how she acquires what she acquires to responsibly, feed her children?

I'm applying to grad school!

2009-12-27T01:27:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas! I'm officially back on the horse! I decided I'm going to apply to grad school at the end of the year next year. As much as I love LA, I think I gotta do it now, or I'm never gonna do it. I missed applications this year already, well it's technically first week of January but I don't want to rush it and put something sloppy together. I want it to be strong, enough for me to be considered for scholarship money. And it will give me a good year to figure out how I'm gonna fund it with grants, fellowships, etc. Now is a great time for Yun to have a benefactor (one that doesn't want to go down her pants!) Yay! lol

No seriously I'm gonna have to figure out some guerrilla tactics on how to get this money. That's part of the excitement of going to grad school, isn't it? Funding! Hee hee.

So I would love to go to Goldsmiths; cuz they're so radical, experimental, and just a bunch of freaks who push the edge and that's what I definitely am! Royal College of Art is amazing and Slade School of Art too, all in London. My fantasy has always been to study in Paris but I really didn't see myself getting a strong body of work together and learning French simultaneously so that was out of the question. But London would love some Bunny! I've always wanted to go to Yale and check out NY on the weekends so I'm gonna apply there too. Plus Barbara Kruger teaches at UCLA right now and I could go and learn from her, she's so awesome. Google her. She's bomb. Great! I have a real goal. A full-ride to one of these fine institutions would be a DREAM. Bunnies can definitely dream, yes we can!

So I'm just gonna become obsessed with making work and getting money to go to one of these awesome schools for free. Yay!

Working out, cuz I want a big ass and working on sculpting the most bunnylicious booty you could ever imagine.... lol. I don't know what's wrong with me right now. I'm just happy and excited about grad school and next year; how shit is gonna be off da chain......Yee!

Happy New Year!

Will be back soon...

2009-12-02T23:35:00.000-05:00

Hi everyone, I know it's been forever since I've posted. There have been many adventures, oh trust me, for sure. But more drama than anything else that I'd rather not go into. My dog of 15 years had to be put to sleep. So I've been sad. A lot people I cherished died this year--Michael Jackson, my beloved grandmother, my mentor and friend Charles Nelson passed from cancer, and recently, Buster. So I've just been doing me. Not to mention the fires I have to put out.

I will be back though. Just staying busy, doing my thing. Redesigning website.

I'm still around... Delayed Update!

2009-07-09T04:38:00.002-04:00

I sympathize! I know a lot of folks have been really wondering what the hell happened to Yun Bai! Where did she go? Her website hasn't changed much, her blog isn't updated, what happened to her?!

I am really appreciative of y'all who have been on my ass about moving about. A lot has happened. A LOT. No bitching, just observation.

* Grandma passed. That was the biggest thing that's affected me lately. The fucked up thing is, our last conversation was about us renting a small apartment for mom, dad, and myself during our visit to Beijing this coming Sept. or Oct.

She was amazing. She blessed and loved, for 95 years. Her little heart was so big. She was so cute, 4' 10". I'm only merely 5' 1.5" which I intentionally round up to 5' 2' myself. It's kinda funny. So grandma would get shorter each year. I swear, perhaps from osteoporosis?

I remember when I was a little hellion, (about four years old), I used to break all her cigarettes. The whole pack! I loved grandma that much. And I'd leave them hidden all nice and safe in the box, in her desk drawer for her to find later. Sometimes she would catch me. Hee...

Her passing woke my ass up. It did. I took our limited time together, for granted. I kept dwelling in my little world, in the little details, and I didn't go see her. I missed out on looking into her little eyes one last time- full of strength, wisdom, and tremendous spirit. I used to give her endless kisses on her soft wrinkled cheeks until she got annoyed, though with laughter. She was so fragile in so many ways. She would take naps, eat cookies, we would eat yogurt and drink milk together.

So yah. She experienced so much. She was always so strong, always expecting and looking forward to shit, I never heard her once say, "I'm too old" until the last couple of years.

I feel so stupid, that I didn't go see her. You don't know how much I regret, that I just didn't get my lazy ass up and GO. I can't say enough about her...RIP grandma. You are forever engraved in my soul.

* I turned 30!
I don't really feel any different. I feel like myself, but just more chill. Honestly, all this hype, all this expectation, I just don't give a fuck anymore, honestly. And this women's obsession with this "35 or bust" self deprecation is absurd to me. Yes, naturally, I'm being aware of my opinions towards marriage and children, but it's not ruling the world.

In fact, I've been really wondering why I should get married at all. It seems too complicated. Merging assets, sharing responsibilities and expenses, having so much dependent on it lasting forever, is only ideal, isn't it? *laughs* Yes, I know. The optimist became cynical. If it were anything else, I'd be out there with my little pigtails and poms poms and you know it. And how many hubbies and wives cheat, or stay together in something so unforgivingly miserable "for the kids"?! Look, I know a divorce could fuck a child up. I understand that. But part of it I believe, is witnessing the non-functionality of the marriage and therefore, the family itself. I don't know. I'm just spitting out my two Bunny cents.

The thing I personally fear the most, is having it fall apart. Or living a lie. Or being trapped; or worse, getting beat up! I know! Bunny is so not being optimistic about this or excited about this at all! In fact, if I ever did bite my bunny nails over anything, it'd be right about now! Thank goodness I don't have a man! Most of my friends are married with kids; well, a good portion at least. It's good. I'm happy for them. I'm just having a hard time grasping the concept. I don't know why I'm so scared of marriage, even though my parents are so in love and so happily married. They're best buddies, and met when they were 13 playing ping pong, and are now 62. That is sacred to me. But am I to believe, and expect, that to happen to me? Like the fairy tale programs you to believe?

* Sad over Michael Jackson. That's obvious. Between grandma and Michael, I was truly devastated. Especially last night,when I watched the memorial and stayed up until 6am watching his videos.

Ok. So, I have a little confession. Come closer. You ready? Ok first of all, you have to seriously forgive what I'm about to tell you. Ok. Here goes. I used to confuse Prince and Michael Jackson. I know! It's a pop cultural sin! But their hair looked the same at the time with the jheri curl thingy going on and you know that's what was up! And a bunch of other people either has the flat-top or the high right low left. Right? *Bunny memory of timeline not according to scale

So here's what happened. When I first came to America I was five and a half. And I thought country music was rock n' roll. I was a little confused, nerdy, uncool, totally homecooked, geeky Bunny. And I loved me some Prince! Only I thought he was Michael Jackson...so when I finally realized I wasn't listening to Michael Jackson, I had to go find out who Michael Jackson was. So that was when I discovered "Bad" (I don't know, my awareness missed 'Thriller' at the time I guess). Don't get me wrong, I have mad respect for both amazing artists, and it was an honest mistake since I was a little kid. I especially have a sentimental memory of my childhood when I think of country music, Prince, and Michael Jackson.

As with any kid, my Michael Jackson admiration grew. "Smooth Criminal" and "Man in the Mirror" are definitely two of my favorites. "'Ben', 'I'll Be There'" are also two of my faves. He had so much love.

Michael Jackson just amazes me- I would imagine that besides astonishing musical talent, the way the memorial was done yesterday just really gave us all a glimpse of the angel that he was to those who were lucky enough to be blessed by his music. I was so ready for his comeback too; and in fact, had spontaneous posted it on MySpace for some reason that I was excited about it. Even looking back on all his work, you still see how progressive he was as an artist. The dancing, the music, the lyrics, somehow when it all happened at once, you felt the joy he was trying to create. You did.

I do feel with this turning 30 thing that losing grandma and losing Michael Jackson, is truly like a shedding of my maiden self. I still see myself as fresh, however a little seasoned right now. I feel like a fresh, tender, perfectly steamed asparagus spear right now. Yes we can! lol

* Taking a vacation to Atlanta and Alabama. Bunny needs to head back to the South for some refreshing and energizing. My friend from NY is meeting me in Atlanta and we are driving up to Alabama for one of our other girl's birthday for that weekend. And one of our other girlfriends is gonna meet us for one day only, so it will be really sweet. I hope we get to roast something, like marshmellows or something. It's funny, because my friend K is African-American, and she has an afro. And I am Asian with blue hair. Our friend L is Caucasian and we are friends with her family, so I said to K, "Don't worry, we'll be straight, we'll be escorted by white people!" I guess we may get some funky stares, but I still miss my beloved South. This trip to Alabama is gonna be interesting; I've never been!

Yee! And I get to see my other homies and spend time with my folks, we're gonna do some merry cooking, hopefully. And I'm just gonna chill. Maybe work on my business plan a bit, but mainly just be, relax, I wanna get back into my meditation and fitness, and definitely some journaling. I definitely am looking to chow down on some good grub while I'm down there. To rejuvenate. Just gonna relax and stay low profile.

Hm....what else is new?

* New tattoo! It's super sexy! I got flowers, a trio of a plum blossom, to remind me that they only blossom in winter, and continue to be persistent, a lotus for me to keep centered and live life as who I was when I was a five year old (I used to eat lotus seeds at the Summer Palace), and an orchid to remind myself its okay to be special and unique amongst so many varieties of people. Aha you ask, where is it? Well let's just say it's somewhere hidden under most casual clothing, and can only be seen when a bathing suit is worn...Just because you have a tattoo doesn't mean it has to be seen by everybody. True?

* Vibrator for your face! Oh my god. I almost forgot. I totally have to tell y'all ladies about this face cleansing brush. You know those folks that make the Sonic toothbrushes? Well they make this amazing face brush! I swear by electric toothbrushes already, so I thought, why not this? I'm just a big fan of anything that vibrates! If you think about it, there hasn't really been anything bad that I know of associated with things that vibrate, do you? I mean, massagers, toothbrushes, facebrushes, vibrators, all good things! lol

Anyways, back to this brush. It massages, exfloliates, cleanses so thoroughly it removes 6x the makeup compared to regular cleansing without the brush, gets rid of dry patches, and helps skin absorb skincare better. Y'all just don't know I haven't been excited about something like this in a while! It just super makes me happy when I use it. And it's totally appropriate for men too! It retails for $225 at Sephora, but I got mine brand new on ebay for $150!

Dude this thing is so amazing, it's like giving your face a orgasm. No joke. It has 4 settings, and you can even use it on your body. And it moves at 300 movements / second or something. My bunny cheeks are smoother, there is definitely a healthy glow, it feels soft like a baby's butt, you gotta get it. You know your face is long overdue for an orgasm! I think Braun or Sonic ought to start an ad campaign about how using their products is like having an orgasm in your mouth or on your face....HA! I'm serious! It'd be pretty different, and funny. And I bet that shit would sell. Because you'd be curious to see how it feels...They should definitely reward me for my crazy Bunny marketing ideas. Lmao!

Daddy, Turning 30, and What LOVE is...

2008-11-05T04:48:00.000-05:00

First off, here are some pics my photographer friend took of me. Check him out at jpmadisonphotography.com.

I've been freaking out about turning 30 and my birthday isn't even until June! I hope this Paxil kicks in soon. Hehe.

So dad is visiting from the beloved ATL, while mom is in Beijing visiting grandma. I really need to go see her, but I didn't wanna go to Beijing in the dead of winter. Plus I wanted to spend some quality time with the main man in my life -- Daddy. Having him here has been a blessing. I've always been closer to my dad, I'm his little tom-girl. Since you can only have one child in China, I have always been into things that boys were into ever since I was a little kid. Dad used to tell me mythical stories he would make up, such as the three-headed dragon and the brave warrior he was in battle with, and of course I wanted to be the Monkey King, the famed mythological martial arts warrior (for those of you who are not familiar with the Monkey King / Sun Wukong, Google it.) I'm looking forward to the next two months with dad: he's gonna teach me all about BlackJack and take a little trip to Vegas; we're gonna do some cooking (he's gonna teach me how to cook some real Chinese stuff, and be my guinea pig for some Western food experiments, hehe). And go explore San Gabriel Valley (Dude, $15 / hr for full body and foot massage, can't beat that!) We just got back from getting massages today (and no, it wasn't weird or shady either). The place is at 301 W. Valley Blvd. #116 San Gabriel, CA 91776 and is downstairs in a shopping center and they are open from 10am to 11:30pm, 7 days a week. I'm just really excited. It's been a long time since I've spent some real quality time with dad, and I just really value it. Feeling lucky and grateful. Which brings us back to the subject of LOVE....

Now that I'm turning 30 in seven months, and was seriously flipping my shit about it (well, enough to get on antidepressants and medication for anxiety, not to mention being in therapy), I am experiencing a certain maturity. Yes, Bunny has officially cocooned her way through and transformed into a WOMAN! La la la la la!!!!! *Belting* I mean, I feel like I am going through puberty, or menopause, or something....(ok, so not menopause, not quite there yet. But you know what I mean, Willis). For once in my life, I'm questioning what love really is, and even though I've been in love three times before, I am asking myself if it was ever real? I almost feel as if I haven't experienced real mature love yet? Like, you know, grown folks love, if there is such a thing? You know y'all, the kind of love where you listen to Barry White? The kind of love Mr. and Mrs. Huxtable had? And, all of a sudden I actually like babies! WTF? "Buster, we're not in Georgia anymore?" This is new ground. Definitely. Welcome to turning 30, Bunny.

Okay so I'll keep you posted on how this whole turning 30 goes. At first I was freaking out, that life was gonna be over as I know it, like it was a countdown or something til Y2K. As one friend put it, "Yun, when I turned 30, the day after felt like any other day". That made me feel better. Plus, I heard somewhere that in heaven, you're eternally 30. Being the positive Bunny that I am, I've started coming up with ideas of how I want to celebrate the day I came into being. More so grateful, that I've made it this far. To say, "Yeah, I'm 30!" is an incredibly amazing thing. I think of all the friends that didn't make it this far. That really put things in perspective. Plus, it's made me really appreciate my body more. Everything works great, and I've been inspired to take care of myself more. I guess you could say, I'm going through a serious transformation in every aspect of my life---personally, healthwise, professionally, everything is being revamped, redesigned, reconstructed.

I've definitely been more true to myself in that I am a real artist. It's what I live and would die for. While I've had a great time in financial world and my mentors have been so amazing, I realized my life belongs to the arts. So yes, Bunny is fully back into art world. Art is my life; my soul food. Art keeps me alive, it's an obsession. And feeding in to the obsession, is what truly makes me feel alive. I realized, that because I've been doing my financial stuff for the past three years and haven't been fully engaged in either financial stuff or art stuff, that it's contributed to my anxiety. Doing art, making art, being in the arts, all of it, makes me feel alive. I feel like a plant who just got watered - renewed, refreshed, growing and on track again. Whew.
Which brings us to this game of life again - there is no way to lose. Because I practically live at Borders books, I read somewhere that you're on the right track if you're happy. Duh. I don't know why that hit me all of a sudden. A friend told me, "Yun, what is the one thing that you do better than anyone else, and you can get paid top dollar for it?" I thought to myself, "Gee, I make some pretty damn cool Porn Flowers. What the fuck am I doing in financial world?" (Hey, I look damn good in a suit though, and I've learned a lot, not to mention making some great alliances). But the time has come for Bunny to get it straight, of what her true calling is, and to obey it. I mean, you can't deny it. You can't deny something you know you were meant to do. It's like my friend said, "Let's say God gave you your dream car, Yun (Cadillac, baby!) and God saw you walking or taking the bus. God would be like, "Yun, WTF? I just gave you a Caddy. Why are you still taking the bus?" He explained that God gave me a gift. And in not honoring that calling, or not honoring that purpose, I'm wasting my talent because I'm riding the bus instead of driving my Caddy. In other words, I'm wasting my talent by not doing my art, which is my Caddy. (Thanks Donovan!)

Okay. So back to turning 30, and then we'll talk more about love. You know what they also say? They also say, that sex is supposed to be much better in your 30s for women! (Well, y'all know I don't do booty buddies, and I've been single for 3 years, so the only relations I've been having is with my beloved BOB, in which I've gone through.....well, I think we're on BOB #5? Hey, I can't help it, they get shorted out?!) My photographer friend makes fun of me--he says, "Bunny, you really need a man to just give you a good once-over. And you need a damn TV. That's why you're all freaking out about turning 30, cuz you sit in your house thinking too much all day, talking to yourself, not to mention looking at all that damn porn ain't helping either girl. Honey you need help! Let me know if you need some help in that department." Haha, silly photog.

Any ideas? Suggestions on how I ought to celebrate the big 30? Well I have 7 months to brainstorm, it'll be awesome! I feel like I'm losing my virginity or something! Whee! I betcha that's what turning 30 is gonna feel like....I'm gonna feel like The Virgin Queen! La la la la la la!!!! *Belting*

So back to the subject of LOVE. I got this book today, "Calling in 'The One'" by Katherine Woodward Thomas.
It's about finding yourself and getting yourself ready so you can find "The One". I realized even if I met "The One", it would get all fucked up because I wouldn't be ready to receive him. WHO I AM today, right now, is not ready for him. So this book has 49 exercises you do to really soul search, work through your past, your fears about intimacy and shit, so you can be open to the meeting "The One". Supposedly, in 7 weeks. You know, get mature and shit. So you can get some Barry White love...grown folks love, like the Huxtables. So I'll let you know what happens.... Oh! Plus, they say, your chances of getting divorced are lower in your 30's....La la la la la la!!

I'll keep you posted how this whole law of attraction mature love turning 30 thing works out....hehe.

Oh, I'll also be showing in a group show at New Gallery, my Houston gallery, opening Dec. 6th. But unfortunately I won't be at the opening because I'll be in Miami mingling around during Art Basel. I'll keep y'all posted.

Obama kicked some ass tonight! Whoo hoo!

You know, maybe I do need to just get a damn TV. Daddy thinks so too... LOL

Things happen for a reason

2008-10-12T19:07:00.001-04:00

They say when you "know", you just know.

People come into your life for a reason. If for a season, or a lifetime, only time will tell.

All I can do is love, with peace and grace.

HA! I miss art already.

2008-09-19T23:18:00.000-04:00

Ha! I miss art already. I've been in financial world, hiding out more than ever, but gonna get back to art world soon. Not so much showing, but probably making art, and more researching and networking more than ever. I know I have a lot to give and contribute to, so I wanna make that happen.

I've missed my blog! I haven't journaled in my private journal either. I've been a bad girl with my art stuff. I haven't been doing much art stuff at all lately. But I realized if I don't do my art, I'm miserable, and completely unbalanced. So I just gotta work that out.

More on the social end of things though, I'm gonna be getting back out more to hang with girlfriends and homeboyz. This whole dating / relationship thing for me, is drifting farther and farther as a last priority for me. I'm really just focused on making millions.....and only have room for platonic friends and allies, and that's it.

I'm really happy being single. I'm really enjoying my time with myself. I don't even date. I just kick it, and there is a difference. I love my gentleman homeboyz though. They really are genuine, wonderful, real gentleman. But homeboyz are still homeboyz. When they're your friend, I can't comment on how they are in a romantic context, because they're my homeboyz. Some of my favorite homeboyz that are the coolest, are such dogs to women they date. lol I call them on it too! They say, "Yeah but Yun they are the kind of women that deserve to get treated like that. You're way too cool, and that's why you're my homegirl. You know the kind I'm talking about." I guess. lmao!

Yeah. I'm just not gonna date, period. No dudes. I don't know why I keep repeating myself. To be my dude, dude's gotta be super duper, extra special with a chocolate bunny on top. I mean, he's gotta be super special and super sweet and super gentleman to be my dude. Maybe it's because I'm 29 and just not into relationships. Yes, I've been single for three years. But I've had a great time. Dating's just not my thing.

Ok, if you think about dating, what is it exactly? It's mediocre. It's gray area. I don't like it. I'm like a dude! It's bad huh? Runaway Bunny.

So if you haven't figured it out folks-yup, I ran away again. But I had good reason to. I believe in order to meet someone cool, you have to keep that area in your life open. I mean, if you have clothes you gotta get rid of that's taking up space in your closet, how are you ever gonna get new clothes? Uh huh. So I had to make room for ambitious sexy hot sweetheart to show up, that's deserving of Bunny's love!

And I know Bunny's love is the best love; that's why I don't give it to just any dude.

I danced.

2008-08-11T02:07:00.001-04:00

I danced tonight. To one of my favorite songs, "California Dreamin'" by the Mamas and the Papas. Hey, I can't help it. I used to swing off vines by the sinkholes in Wakulla County. It's been a while that I danced by myself, and it felt good. I felt free. I danced because it was just me and Buster, and I was suspended in that moment with myself that was so freeing. It was just me, and I didn't have to be anyone else for anybody, for just a moment there...

Ah.....ART

2008-08-10T02:51:00.000-04:00

I miss making art! Not making art is like not having an orgasm. Since January! Can you imagine? lol I miss that creative release.

The only thing I've made this year is my piece for Beijing. Yah, I'm gonna start painting again. My soul yearns for it. I could feel it. The way the paint melts into the wood. Like foreplay. Yah. Gonna get back to it. And you wonder why I hide out up here with me and Buster? In the BunnyPad, my haven? Bunny is private. I rarely go out. I'm a homebunny. Home is where the love is. So just gonna pour my heart out, and paint it. Let it all out. And then I'll show it when I'm ready.

I think success is most pure when you don't care about the success, or the money, or the write ups, or the attention, or the shit that people say about you. Cuz in the end, I just don't care? I don't care. The only thing I care about, is that I gave it my all. I pushed myself. My heart is on this painting, my love, my compassion, and my good intentions. All that matters, is that I said what I had to say, without apology.

I've learned that in life, we're not here to prove anything, but to rather, express something. My fellow artists, my fellow creatives, be grateful that in the wee hours of the evening, in Beethoven's moonlight when we think the clearest with the most clarity, our inspired visions that come to us come as no accident. It is our duty to deliver so the world can enjoy and respond to it. We are a medium. The art travels through us. We'd let the world down if we never even attempted to make it existent?

An idea is just an idea. It is never anything until it comes to fruition. We owe that to humanity, don't we? It's fruition and an attempt, in its completion.

I just fell off the horse, I'm still gonna paint....

2008-08-07T20:10:00.000-04:00

One of my mentors called last night and got me out of my Bunny bitterness. He got me back in the game.

Okay so of course I'm still gonna paint....duh. Did you ever think I wouldn't? Now showing what I'm painting, that's a different story.... lol.

I know something you don't know.

2008-08-07T00:02:00.000-04:00

I know who I am. I know who I was born to be. I know what I'm going to accomplish, who I'm going to impact, what's coming.

Disappearing from art world for 3.5 years to produce new work. I want to hone in on my skills, make art for me. Not for the art world, not for expectations, not for critics, not for collectors, not for commercial. People gave me a lot of suggestions to try to contribute to help and I really appreciate it, but they're not my visions, and they don't move me. "Can you put less pussy in? Can you make it more Asian? Can you make it more delicate? Red ones? White ones? More round? Can you do a gay one? Can you do photographs of my body if I give you photos? Can you do babies?"

For me. For purity. Bringing it back, art for art's sake. Remember y'all- when we make art, we create it for our soul. And that's priceless. It's so easy to forget why we all adore art in the first place.

You can bet your ass I'll be up to rebellious Bunny mischief! Have I ever let you down on that? Have I? Get ready.

2012: A thought to ponder, and what's best for Bunny now

2008-08-03T00:02:00.001-04:00

A friend made me aware that the world may blow up in our lifetime. He actually got me really freaked out and let's just say, "aware" of circumstances in our world-- I'm not going to list the negative list of events going on in our world, but it made me wonder what would it be like if there was no concept of money? If there weren't gold, there weren't commodities, there weren't economic systems, there weren't cars, oil, investments, roads, real estate, corporations, art, music, literature, electricity, if there weren't anything left?

I remember when I was in first grade, our teacher said, you needed three things to survive....."Food, shelter, and love". So if only you and one other person were left in the world, and you were the only two people left on earth, how would you act to that person? Would you be mean as some people exist today? Would you blow them off and ignore them? Would you walk by them and not smile? Would you give them the look over? Would you walk by and think stereotypical thoughts about them based on how they're dressed?

Or would you extend your hand and help them get up? Would you exude love and goodwill? Would you be thankful that they were there with you, the only other person existent in the world? Would you befriend them? Most of all, would you have any other choice but to love them and be their friend, in order for your own survival to exist? That was what I realized yesterday. I vowed to appreciate even more, everything that I have in my life, especially to treat everyone in my life, and the new people that come into my life, as if they were the last person that existed in the world. Why not? Why are we forced to only be kind, love, and treat others so well only if the world had nothing left? Only after bad shit happened? Why can't we do that today? Right now?

Why can't we treat everyone in our lives and the new people we meet, as if they were the last person on earth, because our survival depended on it? Yo, check it, doesn't our survival depend on it now? Doesn't it? What makes our world any different now than if nothing else existed, that we can't act like that today? Exude that kind of love, gratefulness, and befriended them as if? What if we showed that kind of compassion now, and that was the true preventative measure of bad shit happening to us? We take vitamins, work out, all that jazz to stay healthy, but what if spiritually, that was the spiritual medicine to prevent bad shit from happening to our humanity? "Our humanity" sounds a bit funny to some, doesn't it? Yah. But that's what it is. "OUR HUMANITY".

Look, I'm just an artist *sarcastic grin*. Not a theologian, not a scientist, not a spiritual leader, not a politician, just YunnyBunny. But the point is, we all have power that we can make impact with in our own way.

Speaking of being an artist, the more and more I think about it, the longer of a break I wanna take. I am really going to take a good, long, break for the next 2-3 years. Really. The last real break I took was in 2003-2004. Even then, I stopped making work but really did a hell of a lot of marketing. And even when I mean "break", I really mean, laying low on showing my work. You didn't think Bunny would really ever take a break, did you? *tease* I'll just be doing lots of planning, researching, networking, and creating new work. Just not showing it as much til I'm ready to, is all. Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful to everyone that has helped me, believed in me, guided me, given me shows, given me an ass kicking, you know who you are. Thank you to my dear collectors, gallerists, curators, supporters, everyone who has appreciated my work. Don't worry, Bunny will be back stronger than ever. Just laying low, incognito! lol

But I am really going to go deep into financial world, step up my game in every way about myself, and really help some people, sharing what I know. Plus, all the great pieces I've painted, have been sold. I want to paint for myself now, make art for me. I don't wanna make art because it has "too much pussy in it" that I have to make it PG-13, or make it a certain shape, or color, or anything. I feel like I've lost the true enjoyment of making art for the sake of making art, and have to step back to that purity state again. I feel like I've been compromising myself, and my vision to paint what the public wants, which is certainly not the way of how great art is made, I believe. I really want to make art for me, regardless of whether it sells or not. Really, if it doesn't sell, so what? Fuck it?! In the end it's still pure, and that's what matters to me most. I really want to paint for me, and make art for my artist's collection. Plus I really want to revamp my business structure, and completely restructure. So there will still be some shows here and there, but of what I have in inventory now. The new stuff I'm hoarding for when I'm reading to come back into art world, and will only show to a few very selective people after I restructure.

The only thing I am really focused on is stuff for Miami in December, and my solo show in Houston with New Gallery in May, and painting for me. Producing a ton of great work in the next few years, focusing on collaborations, and getting ready for a big boom when I do come back. So if you see me MIA wondering "What happened to Yun Bai, the porn flower girl?" You'll know, she's laying low and building steam for a huge explosion in a couple of years...Get ready!

Work from Chinese Character Biennial

2008-07-28T22:46:00.000-04:00

I got this crown at the Renaissance fair back in May when Laura and I went. It felt good to be medieval for a day.

Here is what I put in the Chinese Biennial, thanks to Wang Jing for the pic! This is a different view from how it was hung, hopefully they will send me some pics later? Here is the invite:

Yun Bai, as curators of the inaugural Chinese Biennial, we have the pleasure of inviting you to participate in this inaugural exhibition of Chinese character spatial art, derived from hanzi. traditional Chinese writing, By bringing artists together in this exhibition of spatialized hanzi alongside dimensional works inspired by it, we affirm that the spatial structure of Chinese characters constitutes a previously suppressed form of sculptural practice and thus we now present a newly formed field termed hanzi spatialized Chinese character art. With this exhibition, the three thousand year history of hanzi is now augmented to include its liberation into space. Artists outside of China whose work reflects the basic approach and philosophy of this art form have been included. The Chinese Biennial additionally showcases dimensional Chinese character art in installations, spoken word, video, performances, music, architecture, design, and fashion. The thirty invited artists are from within China, the Americas, Europe, the UK, Australia, as well as other Asian countries.

Chinese culture has apparently showed evidence of renewal since the beginning of 21st Century. China contemporary art, as an important strategic portion of Chinese neo-culture, certainly does not decline to shoulder the responsibility of reconstructing image of China. Contemporary Chinese artists would not like to give the wrong impression to the world with a blurry and false image of China. During the period from 2nd August, 2008 to 2nd September, 2008 the global initial "Chinese Character Biennale", which is planned by "Chinese Character Base" and hosted by KU Art Center will be open in "KU Art Center Artist Creating Base" and "Chinese Character Base" simultaneously. As a name card of Chinese culture, the Chinese character presents the right to speak and the attitude of loving art of Chinese character clearly means striving for right to speak in the whole world, as well as emphasizing the identity of China contemporary art. In oversea cultural environment the being of Chinese character Art is like a mirror reflecting the political condition of Chinese people living abroad. And it is also a scale indicating the ebbing and flowing complex power between Eastern and Western world. This exhibition has a subject of space Chinese character, exhibiting more than 40 artists' works including Chinese character installations, Chinese character videos, Chinese character actions, Chinese character music, Chinese character architectures, Chinese character sculptures and others. The artists come from China (Taiwan, Hong Kong) America, Britain, Canada, Australia, Austria, Holland, Germany, Korea, Japan, Singapore, Vietnam, Spanish and other countries. These works will induct visitors to consider how to make out flat visual tradition step by step and how to improve weak traditional culture character which emphasizing super organic aspects called "Dao" and disdaining instrumental aspects named "Qi", to consider how to revert spatial structure intension of Chinese character art and how to get rid of orientalism pseudo-conception art's nibbling; to consider how to promote conception of spatial Chinese character art and achieving an international artistic academic new high, therefore, this art will add a new sort to contemporary world art history.

Spatial Chinese character art movements have gradually become influential and, except English, Chinese has been the most important linguistic system using by a large number of people in the world. Chinese character art is of tradition and of vital power as time going. In the process of Chinese cultural policy's adjusting Spatial Chinese character art will be definitely splendid in garden of Chinese arts.

Curator：Pan Xinglei, Koan Jeff Baysa, Li Shi
Duration： 2nd August, 2008 ---- 6th September, 2008
Venue：KU Art Center, Huantie Road, Chaoyang District, Beijing China/ "Chinese Character Base"
Host：KU Art Center, "Chinese Character Base"
Sponsors：红炫制造、美国莱格艺术有限公司、一森•科恩画廊、香港SENSE99、中国评论通讯社、激光广告公司、纽约一森柯恩画廊、重大养生泉矿泉水、奥地利基金会、美国基金会、浙江东方金属艺术工厂、北京京新天科技有限公司等
Closing events: 6th September, 2008
www.kuartcenter.com
www.chinese-base.com

Exhibition period 2 August – 2 October 200

I have really been inspired to grow my hair out lately. As I was brainstorming concepts for this exhibition, I visualized someone with long hair. Like the rings found on a tree, the length of hair shows us passages in time, a series of events, such as "stories". Each strand of hair shows us fragments of many stories. Bundled together, they unite together to tell complete stories. There is parallel between an individual's long hair and the hairs found on a calligraphy brush in that they both tell observational truths, or

"Stories from the Heart".

I chose "silver hair" to set the tone for this installation, to represent an elder's reflective moment of the life they've lived. The installation's aim is to represent how one would feel during a moment of reflection after one has lived a long, passionate, and fulfilling life. Thoughts of my grandmother inspired this installation, she is 94 and still writes calligraphy everyday. I imagined the way her white silvery hair sparkled with its light gray-blue tones, and the way her brush gently let out a short story with each character she wrote. She tells a story from the long life she's lived.

I see long strips of flowing fabric hung from the ceiling, mimicking someone's long hair. Long, light, ethereal, full of wisdom, and draped peacefully, the "hairs" are like the "ghosts" from the stories. There are seven long fabric "hair" bundles floating in space, made of tulle, in the formation spelling the Chinese character " heart".

Unfortunately I won't be able to attend the exhibition, as I am working hard on new projects, and beginning a new body of work for my first solo in Houston, TX at New Gallery in May 2009! But if you are in Beijing for the Olympics, do stop by by...

Pics from my birthday in June

2008-07-28T22:17:00.000-04:00

I got busy and didn't get a chance to post these til now....mom these are for you! Thanks for having that c-section!

Laura and I at California Pizza Kitchen.

We went to this bar, called "Father's Office" in Culver City.

Hee hee.

See what happens when you say "Ice cream"?

Getting a kiss from my Chrissy and Lesley, decade long friends from the ATL. They recruited me to the West Coast!

Pics from my opening at Circus Gallery, July 27, 2008

2008-07-28T20:54:00.000-04:00

Adrian and I.

Bora, my first Turkish friend ever, and artist Will Jolley.

I wanted to ride the frog but I thought I was gonna get stuck in it, so I ended up riding the donkey. :) Hey, girls just wanna have fun!?

Favorite past time #543: Riding the kiddie donkey with 6 inch heels. "Where my lasso, boy?!"

We look like we're twelve. :)

"Do you think we should get off so the kids can have their turn? They look angry...I should get off this donkey before they start throwing things at us?" LOL
It was midnight. There weren't kids out...hee hee.

Balance and Quality = Clarity

2008-07-24T15:38:00.000-04:00

As much as I wanna focus on financial world, I still have to finish my commitments in art world with high standards. As one of my many mentors tells me, "It's not about potential, Yun, it's about EXCELLENCE". Man, all my mentors in both art world and financial world have just been kicking my ass. I mean, the kind of S&M spanking that just turns your ass cheeks bright red....I love a good ass spanking, just makes you forge ahead and keeps you accountable. And I love the many people that are straight shooters and tells it to you straight. I like blunt people. :) Because sometimes I think in such a complex way, in such a technical way, that I miss the common sense point, I miss the big picture.

Yah so that's what's up. I just can't put anything else on the calendar anymore unless it's a big opportunity for art stuff, because I just can't keep up with it. Right now we're booked until May 2009 for my solo with Houston, and sending some pieces out to this other gallery for consideration, but other than that I just can't do anything else. Unless it's a big opportunity you know? I wanna focus on quality, no quantity.

Yah. Just gotta relentlessly focus! Ok, gotta get this database together, get newsletter out, shower, then off to merchant services financial training tonight. It's good to be busy. Makes you feel alive, doesn't it?

YunnyBunny says, "FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE!"

Art Opening: Sat. Jul 26th, 7-9pm, Circus Gallery, Los Angeles

2008-07-23T04:02:00.002-04:00

Strange Ranger is a big celebratory group show. The work ranges from paintings to sculptures. The artists range from Copenhagen to LA with a couple stops in between. July 26 - August 23rd

Opening reception: Jul. 26th, 7-9pm

Circus Gallery
7065 Lexington Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90038
Call us: (323) 962-8506

Call for new summer hours.

This show is curated with the help of Marie Kirkegaard and j. Reto.

From Copenhagen
Anders Brinch
David Dellagi
Christian Finne
Eske Kath
Sian Kristoffersen
Jon Stahn
Melou Vanggaard

From Sweden
Oscar Berglund

From New York
Tim Dowse
Siebren Versteeg

From LA
Yun Bai
Scott Dove
Leandra Hinrichs
William Jolley
Mike Kuhn
Angie Lacerenza
John Luckett
Emily Mast
Alison O'Daniel
j. Reto
Alex Schaefer

What was I thinking?

2008-07-23T03:21:00.000-04:00

Definitely in financial world for the next year and a half.... I am so gonna focus on financial world while we are in this bear market for two reasons.....1) I can serve more people 2) while I take a step back and regroup my art strategy and build more inventory. The only thing I'm fulfilling this year is whatever inventory I need to build for Miami in December, and my solo with New Gallery in Houston in February, and fulfilling my waiting list demands. Other than that, not doing anything else. Just focusing on helping folks with their finances.

Look I love the art world, but I can't stand this art game. So bunny's out of the game for a little while....and will come back with some limited hot work in 2009 for New Gallery in Houston and even bigger momentum in 2010. YEEE!

Get Crunk!

I'm gonna stick to my plan

2008-07-22T15:38:00.000-04:00

I don't know why I keep flip flopping between art and financial world. But I've made a decision and just gonna stick to it at least for the next year and a half until 2010.

I really wanna focus on my financial business right now, while I reassess art world. The economy isn't too strong for luxury items such as art right now, and I'm not going to ride against the wave. Plus with the knowledge and the tools that I have in financial world, I know I can serve more people in it during this challenging time for a lot of folks.

I am very grateful to everyone that has supported me, gave me encouragement, gave me a shot, bought my work, I really appreciate it. I am truly grateful for everyone that believes in my work. I will always have great memories of everyone who has had good intentions for me.

But the truth is, I only do win-win business. It is very important to me that others walk away feeling good about the business that we just did, so we could do it over and over and over again. If they walk away feeling like they got the short end of the stick, they feel resentful and will go around bitching about you (I've had that happen before. They say they're cool with it, only to tell other people you didn't pay them when in fact you definitely paid them, thus fucking with your reputation. Don't we just love passive-aggressiveness). And if I feel like I got the short end of the stick, I would feel resentful. Which is how I've been feeling lately about this whole art thing. I'm really stepping back from it.

I've been feeling really bitter about the art world. Bitter, frustrated, in demand, lots of pressure. Lots of acquaintances, but not that many real friends. Of course, it's business. But being the relationship person that I am, I really value people. I really care about people. I really love people. I really have a lot of compassion for this world. And at the end of the day, I really appreciate all those that have gotten me where I am today.

The truth is, I miss painting. I haven't painted in a long time now, stressed people have come to me with their names wanting to buy art, to see new works, and all I can tell them is that I can contact them when I have new stuff. Instead of doing that, I think I'm gonna start taking pre-paid payments to ensure they get on the real "priority list". So I'm going to make two lists... A list of people who merely want to be notified when I do have new work, and a list to lock in something from me now, before I raise prices again. Because they say when you sell a bit, your prices are a bit low if you sell fast. Well let's just say I've sold through most of the stuff I've made, all the major big pieces are almost spoken for, and the only things I have left are smaller pieces. So I have to replenish inventory, but I'm only going to start with those I care about most----friends, family, and collectors--my VIP, the people who gave me a shot, the people who gave me encouragement, the people who gave me connections, to ensure I make something super special for them; just for them.

I'm just really stepping up my game. Because the truth is, I'm gonna be in this art thing for the long haul, for the next 40-50 years. Yun Bai is in this shit until the end, and if it's anything that you can bet on, you can bet on that. It ain't over til it's over baby!

But the point is, we still have a ways to go. We have a lot of ground to break- stigmas, the status quo. I know I don't have control over the art world. But I do have control over tightening up my game, building a great team, and pushing myself for higher excellence. I can't help it if I'm controversial. I can't help it people don't get me. All I can do is go where I'm going, and whoever wants to come along on the adventure, they're certainly welcome to.

Hey, good girls don't make headway. Only bad rebellious bunnies do. ;)

Decisions.

2008-07-22T01:38:00.000-04:00

I have a lot of decisions to make. Usually I am so good at making decisions and sticking to them. I know what I need to do. But playing politics; being popular; is not my forte. Today was one of those days. Everyone keeps telling me, "Yun you'll get blacklisted from the art world if you do that, no one will work with you". God I just can't stand selling my art, and selling my soul with it. Letting go of a piece at a discount just to sell it, and then having people make you feel guilty just because you wouldn't discount it more. Why do I have to do that, really? That shit just fucks with my temper and I get pissed and just want to say, well you don't have to buy it.

You know? I've been going through a lot of changes lately. New people coming into my life, I feel a stretching of sorts. In all sorts of different directions. But at the end of it all, I am my only CORE. No friend, no family, no man, could add or take away from what I value myself to be. I'm just tired of people telling me what I'm worth. I'm really tired of this art game, the art politics. It disgusts me. It really does.

They make so many promises. They promise things they can't deliver. It's a lot of talk, and after you've spent so much time and effort making it happen, they give excuses as to why they couldn't make it happen. They blame the economy. They blame your prices being too high. They blame that your discounts aren't deep enough. And after you cater to all that they want, they still take 50%. I'm really hesitant to take on a new gallery relationship because I'm just exhausted. I really am. I am really burnt out. A part of me just wants to hide away from the art world, and just make art for me.

I bumped into someone I knew at the $2 show, and she said, "I never see you out. I never see you at any openings." Yeah, well, it's because I'm really shy and maybe I need to get away from the art world for a little bit. Maybe I seriously need to just make art and stay close to myself, and remain private in my little home here in the Valley, with Buster. I'm not angry at the art world. I'm just disillusioned by it; what it is, how it works. Don't get me wrong....everyone I've met so far especially in LA has been so good to me. Giving me great opportunities....but maybe I just need to step back for a bit, make new work, stay loyal to my gallery in Houston, and just stay low key. Man, I love my Houston gallery though. New Gallery has just been really smooth and easy to work with. He's pleasant and happy and soothing.

I just need to reassess. Maybe they will all know my name, but always wonder who I am in person. I want to become a ghost....an art bunny ghost. That makes serious headway, but no where to be found...

Restructuring. Time for new rules.

2008-07-18T18:00:00.001-04:00

Unbelievable! Things are happening at lightning speed that I had to take a step back and reassess my entire business structure. I only have a handful of pieces available from my studio, LA Contemporary (www.lacontemporary.com) has three pieces in their consignment, and New Gallery (www.newgallery.net) in Houston has a few pieces. But other than that, we are really close to selling out. My business team and I are completely restructuring everything in the next month or so, with a new website coming, and we are raising prices for sure. And also reevaluating how discounts are given.

Please don't get me wrong....I totally appreciate all my collectors, supporters, and friends who have been so giving and who believe in me. Without them and their support, I wouldn't have the fuel underneath my ass as I do. Because in working hard, and upping my standards, I am protecting their aesthetic investment. Whether its a cultural or monetary investment for them or not, my best interest is to make sure what they bought has value in both its progressive innovation, and their monetary interests. And that it will continue to rise as my development as an artist grows. We are all in this thing together.

But I am putting my foot down because I remember talking to someone and when I felt like I was being nice in offering a generous discount, he came back with, "Well I could get it for 30% discount from _______" And I remember thinking, WTF? Do I no longer have control over my work anymore? Look, I'm not begging for people to buy my art at ANY COST. That's not how it's gonna go down. The price is set after careful consideration of costs, labor, marketing, etc. And the point is, "No, I'm sorry, I cannot discount 30% because I refuse to bill myself below minimum wage for labor."

So I am upping my standards, period. I AM COMPLIANCE. I have control over distribution, how much new work is put out on the market, branding, pricing, etc. And I've made another decision. I really don't want to compromise my own dignity as an artist, in any sense. I'm just really fed up with how the gallery world works, the status quo, so fuck it y'all, I'm taking my career by the fucking horns, and we're gonna set some new ground rules. And that's another thing...if I'm gonna work with a gallery, I need full contact information. Name, address, phone number, email. That's it. If I can't get the name of the collector for tracking purposes for decades to come to make sure my art doesn't end up in someone's garage sale, then hey, they don't have to buy it. The point is, my shit is gonna be in a MOMA retrospective someday and I want to ensure for history's sake, and for any historian's sake,that the shit is easy to track down and we will have an easier time tracking it down when we do borrow it for the retrospective. You gotta have the end in mind, baby!

I'm gonna step up my game. I've always had a vision for my art and where my art career is going, and really fed up with the under-representation of female artists in the art world. Women are behind in the art game. Most galleries represent more male artists than female artists, and most museums also have more men in their permanent collections. WHAT THE FUCK? Ladies, this is what's happening if we play by the rules. If we stick with the status quo. Fuck the rules. Bunny's making her own.

And you know what? I have one life to live, with only a limited amount of time to make a damn difference in this world. And I don't wanna follow. I wanna set a new standard for everyone. For artists, and especially ladies in the art world. Move over, cause I'm making myself some damn room for us. I heard from one of my dear female artist friends, that a well-known female dealer once told her, "Look, you're a woman. What do you expect?" WHAT THE FUCK? Are you serious?

I've always had respect for my art, and had a vision for it. But this is the time, to implement those standards. I've waited too long. And I've had too many people tell me my work isn't selling because they're priced too high, or that I'm crazy to do certain things, or whatever. I'm glad I followed my gut and raised prices when I did. Because they really have been moving....and the point of this blog entry is to believe in yourself, believe in your vision, and don't compromise your worth. Because if I did, and didn't fight to raise my prices, it wouldn't have set the new standard. And we're raising the bar again. Let's put it this way.....I take BIG RISKS. And I'm just gonna FLY. Cause I'm tired of feeling like my wings are clipped.

With that said, I must look myself in the eye and say, "Yun, did you, yourself, play at peak performance today? Did you, yourself, play at a level 10 if not more?"

As one of my favorite mentors taught me, "Yun if you do anything casually, you'll only get casual results".

PEOPLE always come before MONEY

2008-06-25T15:09:00.000-04:00

I learned many lessons in the past 25 hours.....MANY LESSONS.

The main lesson is, PEOPLE always come before MONEY. I always knew that, but I've never had an appreciation for the human heart as I have had today. We are, by nature good. You are good. You want to help. You do good things. It's in our nature. The world is so full of bullshit.

Why not be the exception? Why not make someone's day with encouragement, praise, and recognition? And respect all creation?

Yes, we are entrepreneurs with vision and we must make money; but never, ever, put someone's heart, trust, and loyalty beneath the dollar.

Remember, the only reason they did business with you is because they liked and trusted you. The only reason they referred you is because they believed in you and wanted to help you. The only reason you are making money, is because of THEM. Never ever bite the hand that feeds you (but of course, unless they truly fuck you).

I learned my lesson a long time ago. It's not worth it to lose amazing people over any kind of money. Their friendship is missed, as you will miss them too.

Don't get me wrong; money is important, but compassion for our existence is more important than getting yours. Having someone's trust is the utmost GIFT. It's the biggest honor.

It really is true-the more you give, the more you get. PLEASE BELIEVE, and try it. If things are really rough for you now, just give a little. Whether it's a smile or a thank you, or a dollar to the homeless, I promise it will come back in some way.

GIVERS GAIN. But it ain't about the gaining part. It's the fulfillment you have within your soul when you've made IMPACT.

You'll know what I'm talking about. Try it today. Smile at someone you don't know. Go out of your way to thank someone. We all have personal power to be impactful.

These are hard times for a lot of folks. Let's exude HOPE for our great nation.

Amazing things, amazing people....

2008-06-25T10:46:00.000-04:00

Wow. Many miracles happened yesterday. I've been up all evening, restless as usual, observing....sleepless...

Learned many lessons today. MANY. I learned, that there are so many wonderful people who LOVE. If you are ever bitter, please stop. There is so much love in this world. SO MUCH. For one, I stayed up all night the previous night preparing for a great presentation. One of my collectors, introduced me to her coworkers / business partners, and her team was impressed with my work, and me. They were all so wonderful, soooo giving, so receptive. I am so grateful Dannielle and friends, SO GRATEFUL. THANK YOU for your love. And they offered to help me because they believed in my mission of what I wanted to exude to the rest of the world.

And many many doors were opened to me. I just have to deliver, and stay true to the mission of inspiring this wonderful creation that we exist in. I had a moment this evening......another restless insomniac all-nighter, reflecting.

I can just say I have sincerity, genuine compassion, and your best interest in mind at all times as much as I am able to give. I had lunch with a new friend today, you know the kind that was meant to be in your life, or maybe not, the kind that exudes love like you do, that contributes to society to give the rest of us, the kind that gives-- the kind that was sent you by the Higher Power to present a message to you. I was putting that energy out there, and it attracted this person. I was inspired. I was.

We are a giving people. We are a giving society. We are a compassionate, special brew. And today was one of those days, that many miracles happened. I saw so much. I saw people smiling. I saw people with courage. I saw people believing in the essence of a higher power. I saw people exuding respect for one another. I saw men and women, respecting the essence of both masculinity and feminine grace. I saw people believing in a vision and wanting to help it come to fruition because deep down they knew there is too much negativity in this world, too much fear, and they wanted to support a vision of bringing compassion to the masses.

THANK YOU. Please believe. For life is short. We only have a limited amount of time. And we don't know how long that time will last. So if you're not doing what you want to be doing, then do what you want to do. And if you're not with the person that you love, then be with the one that you love. And if you're not contributing the way that you want to contribute, then contribute the way that you want to contribute.

It makes a difference. This is our world. Ours. And in the end, our blood, our hearts, are all the same. Jean-Jacques Rousseau said, "Society is born by nature good, it's society that corrupts us" or something like that.

All I can say is, don't be like everyone else. Don't be like 98% of the world that comes from greed, taking, and small-mindedness. Be the exception. Be the model. Be the light that comes from the other 2%. Be the faith for other people. Be the belief that others need within themselves.

BE THE LIGHT WHEN THERE IS NONE.

What to expect in this RECESSION

2008-06-21T23:23:00.001-04:00

I went to a training today, where we had one of the most knowledgeable international economists come and shed some light of what to expect in this recession.

I learned the technical definition of "recession" means "two consecutive quarters of negative growth". He said that Warren Buffet commented that this recession will be deeper and longer than other recessions we have had.

He also said in this bear market recession, the hard hit will come in the second half of 2009, and the first half of 2010, where there will be a large peak in foreclosures. He said the dollar will continue to weaken, and there will be more spending, that the expected duration of this recession will last about 2 years.

But, then again it's all opinion...and different economists all have different opinions. We won't know what's going to go down until it goes down.

Dudes, horses, and faith

2008-06-21T02:11:00.001-04:00

I've been meeting a lot of them lately...and I've been going out, having fun, chatting, and whatnot, kicking it as friends. I mean, friends are safe. Slow is safe.

But still a commitment-phobe. Ha, it would take such an amazing man, and a lot of patience for me to make a commitment. So give it up boys! Yun really isn't on the market.

But I'll always have my art. And my businesses that I'm building. I'm fully 200% committed to those things. Just not dudes. I can't say men will stay--that they'll be around.

Except, amazing platonic homeboyz. Those do stay in my life. For 10, 15 years. Yup, just buddies.

I had a commitment-phobe moment again today, I guess you could say. LOL I can't explain it. I've just become more and more of a runaway bunny lately. I'd have to be friends with a dude for a few years before I could even think about him possibly maybe even being my boyfriend....ew, much less my husband.

I mean, not only would he have to be consistent and seriously patient, he'd have to be all that and a bag of kettle chips and French onion dip on top! lol

Yeah, I've just been really into my life. The art thing, the financial thing, I've just been really all in. I've been meditating a lot, staying positive for myself and those I come into contact with, staying positive for everyone else.

The psychic said that she saw me on a white horse, and people were following me, and that hard times were coming for us all and that I have to remain strong and positive, and inspire people with my art, and help people with what I know about finances.

The funny thing is, I decided to name my car "Horse" that day. I saw myself like Joan of Arc, fighting hard to do good, to help people, to have their best intentions in mind at all times, rushing off to be somewhere...and I'd say, "HORSE!" and he'd come, and we'd gallop away off into the sunset on a crusade to make shit happen...

This is the year. This is the year that big breakthroughs happen. I can feel it. The seeds I've planted, are sprouting. A few galleries have shown interest in showing me in Art Miami in December, which is exciting. Applying for the West Prize, New American Paintings, finishing my piece for the Chinese Character Biennial, my gallery in Houston gave me a solo in February '09, and on Tuesday I'm meeting with some managers to manage me for some licensing deals.

God just let me do good, and be good. As long as I do good and love, the Source is my unfailing supply. I know I'm agnostic and all, but I know something is up there...cuz all kinds of crazy good shit has been happening. I just have to believe a little more faithfully. As if faith was seared into my backbone, into every vertebrae.

I don't give a fuck. Not afraid of shit. For I am a resilient soul, and I know that as long as I stand back up, nothing can keep me down. Get up, Yun, get the fuck up.

I learned that when I apply this kind of faith and resilience with love, miracles happen. It's like Einstein said, "There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."

I know people think I'm a little over the top with my positivity and all, that I'm a little too "yippie" and excited, but I don't give a fuck. I just feel sorry for them that they haven't found that same joy and passion in their own lives to feel as elated as I have---but I wish for them that they all can truly experience inspired joy....

I talked to...

2008-06-12T04:51:00.001-04:00

My friend V today. V and I met four years ago when I was on a plane either coming back from Cali for Atlanta or something. We met once, but have had this cool friendship ever since. V is always so happy, the sweetest gay man you've ever met. Always so positive, even though he lost his lover to AIDS, and has AIDS himself. It was just inspiring to catch up, you could feel the love he exuded over the phone.

And I called grandma in Beijing today. We talked about me possibly visiting in the spring of '09. I am so busy with everything, and I am shy of big crowds, so I wasn't feeling going back during the Olympics or during the Chinese Character Biennial. Yah, I'm gonna miss the opening of the show, but I'm just not feeling going in August. It would freak me out. Chinese Character Biennial folks and the Olympics? Whew... But so grateful, that I got in. I am still pinching myself. Is this even real?

So talking to grandma was so inspiring. She said, "Yun, I love you so much, because you are genuine. You are true, not false". I hope I am. I try. I'm not perfect. I've made mistakes. And I've hurt people when I didn't mean to. I try to exude love. That's really been the message lately, more and more so. If I just approach people with love, then it's all good. I think they feel it, I hope they know.

Life is an amazing thing. I was walking to the car today, and non of it seemed real. It did, it seemed like just another day, but I was so taken aback by existence in itself. That I am Yun Bai, in this lifetime, right here, right now. It's who I am. And you, you are who you are. I guess, I truly have an appreciation for everything that's in our world. Everything. All of it amuses me, keeps me on my toes, keeps me going.

I met with a local curator the other day, she was nice to come over to see my porn flowers and we had dinner in Koreatown. She said, "Yun, you're gonna be something great. You're gonna go down in history". It meant a lot to me, since we don't really know each other that well. More like, good acquaintances, on the verge of friends. And I was touched that she believed in me, she saw it. I don't really care if I go down in history. I just want to make enough to support my parents!

I just want to contribute to it. To have a voice that gives people HOPE. I want that so bad. Is there such a thing that your heart could want to love and contribute and help so badly, that it feels big enough to engulf the world and everything in it? That's how much I LOVE. That much. Really.

I'm showing in the OC! June 5-28. Opening June 7, 6-10pm

2008-06-03T15:24:00.000-04:00

YEEE! I've never showed in the OC, so I thought the folks in the OC would appreciate some hot flower art.
Come check out the porn flowers! www.yunbai. com

See y'all there!

Opening reception: June 7, 2008, 6-10pm
Dates of Exhibition: June 5-28th

Orange County Center for Contemporary Art presents

Enclosed, Encased & Enrobed: A provocative exploration of society's norms and requirements for body coverage.

Darlyn Susan Yee
Christina Ponce
Yun Bai
The Nipple Project

Orange County Center for Contemporary Art
117 N.

Sycamore
Santa Ana, CA 92701
www. occca. org
714.667.1517
Thu-Sun 12-5pm, Fri-Sat 12-5pm, and 5-9pm * call for evening availability

A pleasant birthday surprise...

2008-05-31T03:33:00.000-04:00

MOM: You should skip this one. I love you but I'm 29 and I know we're Asian, but it's my blog and I have to express myself. I love you!

_________________________________

My birthday is Monday, and I'm really excited to turn 29. So I've been getting happy MySpace messages and stuff from folks. But today, out of the blue, I got a call. From him.

"Hey, how you doing Miss Yun Bai, it's your favorite Spider-Man friend, _____. I was looking on the calendar and I realized we had a couple of birthdays coming up and I just wanted to call and tell you "Happy Birthday" even though it's a little early. I just wanted to call and make sure the number I still have is for you. I miss you and I love you and I hope everything is going good with you...remember one day we will spend the rest of our lives together so tell your little boyfriend or whoever the fuck you're fucking with that _____ is coming to town...I'm just joking, well I'm not, but anyway I love you and "Happy Birthday", I plan on talking to you on the 2nd. Goodbye."

God he's so fucking hot. After all these years, his voice still turns me on. His voice is protecting. For months I'd been wondering where he was, how he was doing, if he was still really crazy or if he'd gotten his shit together-- I felt relief and loved hearing his smooth, deep voice. There's only one man, with a voice like that.

I haven't heard from him in two years. It's almost been a decade since I've seen him. I wonder what he looks like now. I wonder how his hair is. We'd never officially "gone out", or were girlfriend / boyfriend, but there is this unexplained love. No matter how much I try to get away from him, leave him, and truly get away and disappear, he keeps coming back. And everytime he comes back, he says we will end up together. And he's been saying this for the last 6 years or so.

Crazy. You see, there was a reason we never went out. We were in different states. He was a little mack-daddy heartbreaker. And what can smart bunnies do? Smart bunnies can smell shit from a mile away...so I had to leave him be. He'd make any girl cry...

Yet he still calls...out of the blue. To leave happy loving messages of how we're gonna be together one day. How he knows we're gonna be together. Unbelievable.

For a minute, I imagined us together. Like when we were kids. We were exotic. He was always so careful, and gentle with me. We were opposites, in every sense of the word. I always told him kissing him, was like kissing a soft cloud. I remember our showers together. Sitting in the park at Waverly Hills watching the ducks. How he always called me, "Ms. Bai". He was so happy to be with me when I visited, you could see how much he cherished me when we were together. I remember his smiling face. I think he has comfort in knowing that he's wanted. That he wants to think that I still want him.

I'm just glad he's alive, honestly. He's the kind of man you wonder if he's dead or alive these days, you know? Unattainable. Yet he has this gentleness, this loving protective peacefulness, that I remember about him. I have love for him. I want him to be happy and safe. I know when he calls he's just remembering our love; who we were to ourselves and to each other, back then. I miss it too.

But still, a broken heart can't be mended. Good thing the fucker lives 3,000 miles away. I still think he's crazy. *bunny sniff*

Artichoke

2008-05-23T03:08:00.000-04:00

I went to a party tonight, and these nice people showed me how to eat my first artichoke. It was a curious, exciting, nervous moment, they showed me how to eat it petal by petal, I felt primitive. Okay so you're talking to the girl that has no TV, certainly not cable.

I felt like the first man ever in existence, eating a lobster or something. Can you imagine the bravery? Only it wasn't as threatening. I could hear the mysterious music in the background playing as I picked up a petal, looked at it closely, examined it, dipped it in this yellow mustard thing, and closed my eyes and held on dear mercy.

You see, us Chinese people, we don't eat artichoke that I know of. I have never seen kung pao artichoke, have you? Have you ever seen artichoke on a Chinese menu? Have you? Thought so. So don't look at me like I'm some Asian hillbilly hick that has never seen an artichoke. Because the truth is, I haven't.

You know how you feel when you go to the Asian grocery store and you don't know what the hell you're looking at? That's how I feel about artichoke. Point made. hee hee. ;)

I lived a full day today.

2008-05-22T05:44:00.000-04:00

I lived a full day today. What stood out were two things mainly, one being the true sense of freedom I realized I had as a woman in our day in age, much inspired by one of my best friends Laura Clemons, and two, something my grandmother has said over and over in her advice concerning men.

So let me tell you about my friend Laura. She is pure feminine fire. A true woman, independent yet feminine, fiery with vision, loyal, bringing nothing but value to the table. Full of spunk, wit, and charm. We've all grown so much over the years, but Laura inspires me to be great--simply because she, is great. Her business reputation precedes her, well respected by all. Truly, a lady. A lady of integrity, dignity, and the utmost strength, and mental toughness, I have ever seen in a woman (in a very long time). It is rare to keep the company of such an amazing person, such character. I hope everyone has the opportunity to have someone with the heart, determination, and strength of Laura in their lives. And gentlemen, I hope you learn to appreciate bold, brazen babes like Laura and myself--for a woman with no boundaries, limits, nor fear, is truly free. It's only then, that we are truly relinquished and able to pursue and create, what our real desires are...

Which brings me to the subject of marriage again; I know y'all are tired of hearing, so this is my final decision pertaining to marriage. Everyone in my family is starting to "hint". Even some punk ass skinny jheri-curled stranger I recently came across at a party commented with "biological clock ticking, ehh? It's time." after I gave a surface compliment to how cute the baby was sitting next to him, in the arms of its mother.

The point is, there are no boundaries in life. There are none. To be a woman right now, in our day in age, is the best time for fruition of any dream, any desire. I've truly come into my own, in defining how I want to exist. How I want to just be. How to just be myself, by being the best of myself. We are women, we have more power than we currently give ourselves. We have a sense of feminine freedom that I have just recently discovered and tapped into, that I wish so many other women can find that same sense of freedom within their heart, and themselves.

I am truly grateful, to be able to practice my freedom, and not give a care of how a "good woman" or a "tidy woman" ought to behave. I would like to think Laura would agree with me - I'd rather be a strong woman with a passionate heart, than a conventional woman with fearful thoughts. It's always been a belief of mine that only bad girls (with vision) make headway. I am blessed to be surrounded by such strong female warriors, fighting for our own seat on the stage of success.

So marriage isn't for me. I don't believe that men, in their human nature, could be physically committed to one woman forever. I think it sets you up for failure and confusion when it does fall apart. To think, the pressure. And for us women, when a man does cheat on us, we blame ourselves..."What did I do wrong that he would stray?" Automatically we blame ourselves.

Don't get me wrong, I am all about monogamy. It is a beautiful thing between two people. But the expectation that it's supposed to last forever, is blinding. I'm not saying that monogamy that lasts forever is blinding, only the expectation of it is. We all long for it. But to expect it, to put all your expectation in it lasting forever, is illusion. I see myself not getting married, being in a relationship, having some kids, living together peacefully with joy and taking it for what it is. For however long it lasts. But to expect it that it will last forever, almost jinx's it.

Which brings us to a very interesting point my grandmother has always reminded me when giving advice on the opposite sex--come to think of it, it's her only piece of advice she's given on the subject of love and men, reiterated frequently:

"The man that loves you more than you love him, will treat you the best."

To all my Gay friends: CONGRATS!

2008-05-15T16:06:00.000-04:00

I love you all and this is a historical moment for us all....
...that souls may simply love souls.

The California Supreme Court overturned the gay marriage ban today.

We're not

2008-05-11T08:42:00.000-04:00

I've been meeting all kinds of people from film and music, and it's so new and interesting to me, all fascinating stuff, and you know I ask tons of interesting questions to satisfy my lust for learning. But learning, it's weird at the same time.

Uh oh Buster,
we're not in Georgia anymore...

Here's what I realized about dudes...

2008-05-11T06:59:00.000-04:00

Y'all know I like to organize. I had to define what certain words meant to me. It helped, I have clarity now.

HOMEBOY =
where I'm at right now, platonic brotherly types that you have known for a long time that have your back. True friends. And you know they will be with you for life. Homeboys you've known for 18+ years and then some.

LOVER =
someone you like and possibly sleep with, that cares about you maybe, and there is attraction, but there is some kind of gray area murkiness that's mysterious and almost even forbidden. Something's off, something's not right, but it's okay because it feels so good and you learn the important lesson that one must first know pleasure, in order to give pleasure.

BOYFRIEND =
My man. My love. The one I truly open up to. And maybe consider building something with. My best friend.

HUSBAND =
This dude knows he's one special motherfucker because I honor and adore him like my King. The man I choose to be the father of my children. I hope to learn about a kind of unconditional love I haven't known of before.

Adventure!

2008-05-11T06:28:00.000-04:00

I love homeboys. They are the best. They are truly, besides my closest girlfriends, some of the best friends I have. Both gay and straight. Homeboys are just simply the best because you truly get to recognize and appreciate men at their most giving, always respectful, never dirty. Pure platonic love. Shotouts to Terry, Pasqual, Carlos in Miami, DJ Mafioso, thanks for being there for the Bunny.

I went out with Steven Wolkoff and Gavin Bunner tonight, and we assigned nicknames for ourselves. Of course mine was YunnyBunny, and Gavin's was "G Buns" which I thought was off the chain. It fits his personality so perfectly. And Steven's is gonna come to him later. And Gavin even invented this amazing handshake! It was all about unity and it was awesome...I feel like I know where the secret treehouse is or something....ooooh. :)

So we went to this opening at Bergamont Station, then headed to Chinatown to see Terence Koh at Peres Projects, it was inspiring. He gave me a hug and was very sweet. It's always exciting to meet an artist you admire. I felt happy to meet John Baldessari and Barbara Kruger, and felt nervous and excited when I met them too. So yes, I was inspired today. Then we went to "Mandrake", this bar in Culver City, which I've never been to, but the music was good, and the people seemed nice.

Then when we went back to Bergamont Station but the gates were locked. Gavin tried to climb over the gate, but no success because we couldn't it open to get the cars out. I would have tried to help and contribute, but today was one of those days that I didn't wear panties so that option was out. Even though I'm a tom-girl in a skirt, I just couldn't climb a fence with no panties!

So finally we got our cars out, and the evening ended wonderfully with Gavin and I doing our awesome new handshake in celebration after Steve dropped us off.

Like I said, homeboys are the best.

PS--If you ever see me, make sure you ask me to show you the handshake so you can pass it on...hee hee.

I became a Runaway Bunny.

2008-05-10T14:59:00.000-04:00

I became the Runaway Bunny.

I suck at dating. LOL. I'm just bad at it. Period.

Yeah.

Over the past three years, I've become a complete commitment-phobe. Not that I've ever cheated before, but just afraid to get into anything again. I'm not really sure how it came to be. But I definitely know how to lose a guy in 2 days!

Even if I did have a blast with a guy on a date. I start thinking about all the shit that could go wrong. And the time you invest. And your emotions and feelings. And the hotness. The giddiness. And the distractions. The curiousness and how you get so horny when you like someone. And how you get attached.

It's the attachment part that freaks me out. I don't want to get attached. Attachment to me means opening yourself up for possible attack. Or disappointment. Attachment means to me, a sense of losing your independence. I'm an independent person so that makes sense right?

I look at these housewives that are financially dependent on their men and being cheated on, and can't get out because they have no life outside their home, job or education skills, "for the sake of the kids". What sort of existence is that? How big of a lie would your life be? And what if I fall into that trap, getting too comfortable and completely trusted my man and believed faithfully that being a homemaker is totally awesome?! Look, I have no doubt that being a homemaker is awesome, and I stand 100% behind the art of being a homemaker, for both genders. But I don't stand behind being a homemaker when you are not able to afford it. It's just too much collateral for me. It'd be different if a woman chose to stay at home because she had businesses that gave her a residual income and could leave at any time if shit went haywire. That's what I'm gonna do.

Ok so I am completely bitching. The fact that my parents ask me what am I doing about dating is not helping the commitment phobia. They remind me that I am going to be 29 next month. And this whole biological clock thing I think is an utter illusion.
A woman always has a choice to become a mother or not, at any age. That is such a blessing. I don't have kids yet, but I have no doubt I'm going to be an awesome mom when the time is right. If I'm ready when I'm 50, so what? That doesn't make me any less of a woman if my choice is then.

I just don't want to get hurt. One thing I learned in business that I think really applies in life is to only be committed to those that are committed to you. Dudes are distracting. They're so charming and you can't tell what they're really about. Shit half the time I have to borrow someone's gaydar just to double check. lmao

So the verdict is.....Yun is a commitment-phobe. The thought of marriage freaks me out like a motherfucker. I think it's the expectation that it's supposed to last forever that freaks me out. When I get married, I'm gonna make a five year commitment to start with, and then you can renew...LOL But I definitely want to get married every year. I'd rather get married every year to remind you of your awesome marriage over celebrating Christmas, definitely.

Ok. I feel better. Ladies fuck your biological clock!

So fuck it. I'm cool. I'm straight. No need to rush, just gonna chill...focus on my endeavors, go to the nude beach with my gay boys, hang with my homegirls, spend time with Buster, and kick it. It's gonna be a fun hot summer.

I got into the Chinese Character Biennial!

2008-04-30T03:35:00.000-04:00

Yowzie. I knew I had a show coming up in August in Beijing. But somehow the information got sent to an email address I never check about a month ago, and turns out the deadline is May 1st.

Fuck! All I'm doing is this proposal tomorrow (after I get a long deserved facial). It'll be fun. I've missed doing art, especially a good art challenge. Keeps me on my toes.

And, to put more pressure on it, it's the first Chinese Character Biennial! I am sooo fucking excited! I'm so grateful I have an opportunity to challenge myself to push for peak performance!

It's gonna be really challenging for me---Y'all know I categorize myself as a painter, working in 2D, plus I've been developing my "Porn Flowers" for five years now. So the show's theme is centered around hanzi, the Chinese character (which is so out of my norm, hehe.) and it has to be 3D! No painting or 2D stuff at all!

Shit.

It's cool, it's all good, I'm nervous and excited at the same time. I just have to bust out with some amazing shit....and right now, I kind of see it. I just have to meditate on it, and it'll come. Plus, I have this show at Orange County Center for Contemporary Art, and my attorney is throwing a private viewing for me at her new home....stressed, freaking out, but excited and nervous still....I am a lucky bitch! A lucky grateful grateful bitch. Thank you, Universe!

Fucking YEEEE!

Dude, a revelation!

2008-04-19T00:37:00.000-04:00

I had to get out of the house and head over to one of my homeboys' instead. Homeboys are the best. They're like your gay boys, except they're straight and you can't talk about pink lacy panties with them. Hee hee. Just got back. Boy do I feel like Doogie Howser right now! Bloggers? You feel me?

So y'all know I don't own a TV. I watch a ton of movies though, but can't do television. But when I do watch it (usually at other people's houses), I'm like a little kid in a whole new world. Even commercials seem amusing! I don't give a fuck either if the people at the gym want to stare at me when I'm laughing out loud at a damn commercial. There. I said it. "It's my blog and I can say it if I want to....uh uh uh....!"

So anyways. I was watching this reality show called "Miss Rap Supreme" on VH1 I believe, and it was awesome! It really inspired me. Especially Yo-Yo being on the show as one of the judges and all. They portrayed her as very ethereal and goddess-like on the show, as they should.

I really observed teamwork, competition, having good sportswomanship, but most of all, what really stood out for me was PERFORMANCE. Hell, I know I played at a level 1 today. I didn't do anything except get my butt to the gym and even that felt like a struggle. I admired those ladies. But you could see who was in the game and who was holding back.

Which was the lesson of the day. My performance isn't good enough right now. I need to step up my game.

Other than that, I've been working my ass off. Got a little burnt out, took a little rest, but now focused and ready once more.

Listening...

2008-03-18T04:50:00.000-04:00

Listening to music. And ideas. I had a great vision today. A phenomenal vision. I have always been fascinated with courtesans, so I've been doing extensive research, and then the perfect vision came. Feminism. and then some. You have no idea. I'm concerned with China's growing AIDS crisis. I am. I am fearful. All my talk is random, it's 2am in the morning, let's just say the vision includes all of the above.

But there are so many ideas I have yet to finish. Complete. Convey.

So I talked to my grandma today, it was her birthday. Grandma is the best because she still sets goals and plans for her life. She says, "Niu-niu, I will teach you calligraphy when you come live with me". I'm so excited. To spend some time with grandma. I have to go. I miss her. She is on the level of the purist Buddhas. I want to think, that when you hit a century in age, that it automatically grants you "enlightenment". I think she turned 94 today.

Time kicks me in my ass. I have issues with time. :) I do. I can't keep track of it, there isn't enough of it, it seems slow when I tell myself it is, but nonetheless slips away when I don't want it to...I wish I could catch it. Hold it. Keep it long enough to say it's mine.

I guess that would be "me time", then, huh?

I'm good. I'm happy. I raised my standards in myself. I really raised the bar on myself. I must say, I've been bitter with the art world. I can say that. I don't give a fuck. Rules, no rules, these rules, that rules, MFA, no MFA, politics, gossip, whatever the hell.

Ha! The happy girl got bitchy. Yah. So I decided I'm making art, and that's it. Hiding out, making art. Being stealth. Hiding away at the same time. Keeping a low profile. That's me anyways. I value intimacy, and solitude. Just me n' Buster. Yup yup.

That's it. I'm staying away from art world for a while. I'm just really burnt out from showing. I'm only going to do 1-2 big shows a year, aside some group shows from inventory I have, and that's it. And focusing on other projects.

Research and development. I have to work on myself. I have to brush up on my Chinese, I want to be more health conscious, I want to learn and perfect my craft. Be really good at what it is I set out to do. Learning a lot about financial stuff.

This week is going to be really exciting. A lot of new people are coming into my life...

Taking a break

2008-03-15T00:00:00.001-04:00

My goodness, I am taking a break from art world! I will be really busy making new work, being mischievous and developing new projects. But other than that, I'm laying low. Not doing art shows except 1-2 per year, tops. Perhaps some group shows.

Pulling back to move forward, if that makes sense.

My sense of anxiousness and urgency has reached a new level. I'm onto a whole different level now. I'm really onto some new things, and changing up my strategy. Things happen for a reason, and I see now that as far as my art career goes, many new doors are opening up that will help me fulfill my visions.

I just have to finish my commitments, but after that, Yun's gonna disappear into art stealth mode. Not to be heard from, but making progress in leaps and bounds...

Big stuff happening...

2008-03-12T06:04:00.001-04:00

I am so excited! I decided to take a year off from showing my art. I want to work on my financial services business for a year, because I have an opportunity to expand to China if I choose.

I will be creating a new body of work, developing some other visions, working with designers and musicians on some amazing projects. It's all pretty hush hush, but you'll see it when you see it! Get ready!

I am looking forward to moving to China for a few years, to spend time with my grandma, really be influenced by the art scene over there, and to take all my endeavors global. So I hope to move to Beijing within a year and a half.

Other than that, just keeping a low profile, and remaining intense.

Lots of hot stuff happening. Oh, just started a new relationship with New Gallery in Houston, very grateful and lucky to be working with Thom Andriola.

And just staying hopeful and humble.
I am, truly, the luckiest bitch in the whole wide world. :)

Simple truths

2008-02-28T04:11:00.001-05:00

Nothing special, just two truths I realized to myself today....

1. I love and hate the art world at the same time. I'm in it. I'm right in the midst of it. Like all of those other folks in it. If people could get caught up in a tornado, twirling around, without hurting themselves, that's what the art world feels like. For the most part it's a fun ride but other times you get pretty banged up. And today ended as one of those days.

2. I could never marry a man for money, even if he had millions. If I marry, it must be for true love. Plus, I gotta make my own millions! I don't think I could ever let a man "take care" of me financially. I guess it'd be the ultimate trust to let a man do that, huh? :)

The Best Valentine's Day Ever!

2008-02-15T06:00:00.000-05:00

I went to my art opening at Art Murmur tonight, after the gallery settled into its new location.

Had so much fun tonight! I will always love downtown. There's something about it, maybe it's the first place that welcomed me, besides Chinatown. Maybe it was folks like Bert Green and Leandra from Art Murmur that gave me love and support in my art. Maybe it was folks like Ed Fuentes, Heidi Hutchinson, Suzi Moon, Lilli Muller (bless her for adopting me on Thanksgiving!), that makes the downtown community kick ass. There's a ton of other people, just happy familiar faces I love seeing around downtown.

After the opening, I met up with some friends for drinks, then we went to a house party, then to a another friend's house and chilled there. Then came home to my cozy pad, hanging with Buster.

This week is gonna be crazy! This Saturday is really going to be crazy! I have a financial training in the morning with my firm (I'm a financial services professional also, my "double" life"), then some work stuff, then off to a friend's art opening, then off to see my friend DJ Rilla spin. Then maybe church on Sunday? I keep saying I'm gonna go, but I still haven't gone since 1987!

Maybe because I keep choosing sleeping in, over going to the house of God. :)
But God and I are cool, we have always been close.....I talk to it everyday in the shower and show my gratitude. I don't think God cares whether you communicate in church, or if you communicate in the shower while scrubbing your armpit-- the point is to come from a higher self within yourself, like God does.

Isn't that why they call it your "higher self"?

Art Opening: Feb. 14th, 6-9pm. Art Murmur Gallery. 105 E. 6th St. LA, CA 90014

2008-02-11T20:12:00.000-05:00

Art Murmur Gallery
presents

"YUN BAI aka YunnyBunny: Who's That Girl?"
A solo exhibition

Feb. 13 - Mar.22, 2008
Wed-Sat. 12-6pm

Feb. 14th,6-9pm: Artist Reception
Mar. 13,6-9pm. Downtown Arts Walk
Mar. 22, show closes!

With her beautifully provocative "Porn Flowers," Ms. Bai has garnered the attention of collectors across the globe, and has been singled out by Peter Frank on LA Weekly's "Top 10 Emerging Artists" list. What exactly is a "Porn Flower?" More so, what does it symbolize, and how did Bai come up with the idea? The story is compelling. Ms. Bai drew from her early experience as an exotic dancer - a job she took during a very trying time while putting herself through college (her parents were forced to file bankruptcy after her mother was diagnosed with cancer). Though the experience was demeaning, her later analysis of that time gave Bai a new perspective and a greater level of dignity. She was able to transform the objectification she felt into a liberating and defiant self love. The intriguing process of creating the Porn Flowers begins with Bai collecting the magazine images she later incorporates into the painting collages. Since pornographic material can be expensive, Bai places internet personal ads asking for free donations of printed porn. Together with her rather brawny male friend, Bai meets the various donors in well lit public places for these transactions. To this date, she has collected a vast pornographic treasure trove. This somewhat involved creative process only serves to enhance the power, depth, and complexity of the work.

Yun Bai's equally feminist minded alter-ego - Yunnybunny has also had notable recognition. In participation with Art Murmur, yunnybunny's painting "Dream Car No. 1" was recently featured in the Wall Street Journal article about the Art Basel Miami phenomenon and its satellite events - http://online.wsj.com/article/SB119647704177910430.html. With yunnybunny, the artist seeks to create a ubiquitous, universal symbol of female empowerment, most especially for young girls. Yunnybunny differs from the more serious and knowing Yun, and is characterized in the work by a little pink bunny. She seeks to inspire women from all walks of life to reach further and "FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE!" These seemingly simple messages are in reality psychologically complex, with art historical citations of philosophy, religion, and pop culture.

The contrast of these individually cohesive bodies of work promises a visually and conceptually compelling display from an artist at the peak of her creative powers. Please join us this Thursday for the Downtown Art Walk and artist's reception.

Leandra Hinrichs
Art Murmur Gallery

www.artmurmur.com
www.yunbai.com

Is it possible to go from friends to monogamy?

2007-11-17T07:34:00.001-05:00

I can't deal with dating, it's too gray area for me...is it possible to go from friends to monogamy? And skip the whole dating part?

Dating = gray area = confusion for Yun

Hookups = "Ugh, why'd I do that?"

Friends = safe zone, you're not in

Monogamy = love explosion, you are in

Your thoughts?

I'm going back to Church!

2007-11-17T05:44:00.000-05:00

Hehe. Going to church and playing basketball with your homeboys is much more relaxing than going on a date I think....

I haven't been to church since 1987! And will go to Agape for the first time on Sunday, and playing B-Ball with one of my homeboys from my financial company afterwards.

Yup yup. I can handle that. Homeboys never stress you out like the dudes you're dating!

No, No, No, No, No

2007-11-17T03:05:00.000-05:00

So they announced the winners of the Whitney Biennial for 2008 today in the NY Times. All in all, I was relieved and now I'll just have to work harder for the next one! At least I had a real shot. I know they saw it, and considered it, and I am more than humble to focus on the next one. I feel good that my shit was even considered.

The next one will be ours. The next one.

So what am I saying no to? Dating, dudes, LTR's, all that jazz. It's been two years since my last relationship and I thought I was ready and started actively dating again, and it was just exhausting. It was. I feel really relieved now, if anything. It's so much easier that way. I didn't want to put myself out there. I was hanging out with a few dudes, who were all pretty cool, one I particularly liked more so than the other ones, but it just got weird.

So I just ended everything, all of it, today. The shit stressed me out and I couldn't focus. As impatient as I am, I got overwhelmed and confused. Today was just a reality check. I had to recheck myself and where I was in my life, and had to set my priorities straight. I didn't want to hurt anybody or be hurt. I didn't want to wonder if someone liked me, or have dudes wonder that about me, or wonder if I should call or not, or when I should return someone's call, all those rules and games, protocol, etiquette, when to have sex, when not to have sex, how to have "the talk", oh my god it just all overwhelmed me. I didn't want to reject or be rejected. I didn't want to get my hopes up and be disappointed. Plus all my friends are married working on their second kid, or their second marriage, and it just freaked me out. I'm staying away from dudes like a vampire stays away from garlic.

I don't want to waste my heart. The bunny heart is the sweetest heart. It has the sweetest love. Any one of my good friends who know me really well can vouch for that. But even the Bunny heart is afraid. I can't even go there. I thought about opening up, slowly, getting to know someone slowly, but even then the waiting, the wondering, the slowness, drove me nuts. I guess the big thing was I didn't want to invest all that heart. I'd rather give the Bunny heart to people that I know who will be around--family, girlfriends, homeboys....not necessarily lovers. A friend will always be around, a lover may not. I'd rather have friends, that way they'll be in your lives longer. Right?

I thought I was ready. But I know I'm not. I think about it and it seemed so long ago. I think about how it was, and how badly it ended. I don't know what happened. Somehow I became the Runaway Bunny ever since. I get scared, and I run. I shut down. I go into hiding. I'm MIA.

It's frustrating. I'm so much more confident when dealing in business, or meeting new friends. But when it comes to dudes I like, I get weird. So instead of sticking around to get hurt or rejected, I run. It's not that I have confidence issues, because I don't. It's more so the energy, the emotions, that I can't deal with. You know when you have chemistry with someone? Or when you are really attracted to that person, the way they smell, or the way they laugh? Or how smooth their skin feels? Yup. That's when I start freaking out.

And think about it this way.....the growing into a relationship and recovery from a relationship takes so much work. Takes up so much time. Its' so distracting. I remember when I was getting over my ex, it took me the first year just to get over him, and the second year to be brave enough to get out there again and start dating. I really put in a good shot. I really tried the dating thing. But the truth was I didn't want to lead anyone on that I wasn't crazy about, which is why I did what I did, and well, a girl knows when someone just "isn't that into you", so I just let everyone go.

I know what I want. I know that I don't want a guy that makes you wonder whether he likes you or not. I know that I don't want a guy that isn't excited about what could be. I know that I don't want a guy that doesn't respond, and leaves you hanging. But on the other hand, I know I don't want to hurt a guy that's crazy about me and I don't have the heart to feel the same. I know that I have to free him so he can go find someone that deserves him, because I'm not able to give him the love he deserves. I know when a guy isn't capable of giving, and that's when you gotta RUN.

I'm capable of giving, and I know I make a cool, sexy girlfriend. I'm just scared shitless with the filtering process of who to give the Bunnylove to...Dating and kicking it with a few dudes keeps you busy, but it's not for me. It stresses me out and I freak out. I do better with monogamy. I can't date just to "date". It seems half-ass, and I don't want to do anything half ass. I'M ALL OR NOTHING. I feel like when you meet someone, you just know whether you want to spend more time with them, or you don't. Which is why I cut it off with the ones that I wasn't into, and I cut it off with the ones that I felt wasn't all that into me.

Which brings me back to square one-- I'll always have my art. But I may not always have the man...

Homeboys are the flowers in the garden of life.

2007-11-17T02:32:00.000-05:00

Here are a few pics of Shelley, my "Panda Sister", Michelle, and my close homeboy Terry.

I love Terry. He's been a great friend of mine for 10 years, and we've never gotten into an argument. Not even a little spat. He's been nothing but awesome and fun, and I even have him listed as my emergency contact. Hehe. And he's single ladies!

I love you man! You'll always be my favorite Honky!

Happy

2007-11-09T15:19:00.000-05:00

Ok so I finally met someone that is pretty cool to kick it with. We'll see. I'm dating, but I'm especially fond of this one. Hee hee. We'll see. I don't want to put myself out there too fast too soon. Still feeling him out getting to know him, that's all.

Even though it's been almost two years since my last LTR, I'm ready for another one but somewhat hesitant, of course Bunny doesn't want to get hurt!

So I've decided to keep dating and just take it really slow. No titles, no expectations, just fun and laughs. Plus, I just have to focus on what I'm set out to do in 2008!

I expect some incredible miracles to happen. Some wild awesome crazy stuff to come into my life because I expect it. Yup yup!

Gotta be happy. One of my financial trainers did a great training this week, it was about being happy. I know, a weird subject to train on, but what he said just made so much sense and it just works! So y'all know I'm pretty bubbly and happy usually anyways. But he said to step it up a few notches, so bubbly Yun went to super-bubbly Yun! All kinds of stuff came my way...free stuff, opportunities, money, a new fun guy to kick it with, etc.

So be happy! Kick it up a few notches and see how your life changes. It's awesome. And to those people who think, "God she's just so bubbly, energetic, open, and happy all the time, it's kind of annoying!" Well guess what? Why should I be like them and come from a place of negativity, fear, ego, and scarcity when I can choose to come from a place of love, abundance, and spirit? Hm??? It's a much better release to live freely, and serves people more?

Whitney Biennial?

2007-11-06T05:45:00.000-05:00

Gosh it's all I ever wanted was to be included ever since I started doing art professionally in 2002. Well the next one is in March, and I have been doing some serious wishful thinking.

It's weird, that when you focus on something, it really happens! So we'll see what happens with the Whitney. I wanted to get into New American Paintings so bad, and finally made it after getting rejected three times, but made it in issue No. 67. Hey, persistence pays off eventually.

So I've been seriously obsessed with the Whitney for over a year now. I think all my mentors, curators, and friends that are in the art world are so sick of me talking about it! But I really want it bad, just so people can hear the message.

I'm putting it out there Universe! YunnyBunny wants to get into the Whitney Biennial this next time around so bad so the world can hear the message about the Porn Flowers. I'm not here to prove anything, I'm here to express something. Please let that formal letter in writing come in the mail real soon!!!!!

Cross your fingers for me, y'all know I'm a bubbly crazy bitch, but it doesn't hurt to put it out there! I mean, this entry in my blog has to have some magnetic force, right?

Plus, the psychics all have said it's going to happen?

We'll see what happens come March. Hee hee. *hopeful, starry-eyed, grateful..*

I wish

2007-11-04T13:41:00.001-05:00

I wish we could wake up with an extra hour everyday...

Tonight....

2007-11-03T08:30:00.000-04:00

You guys know I love to fool around the camera and be stupid. Goofing around, whatever. So I took some new pics. It goes with my urge to document my life---through journals, blogs, photos, etc. I love photography. I admire things that I don't excel in....such as photography.

Went out to the Vanguard this evening, never been there before. It was one of the girl's birthday from my financial company that I'm affiliated with. It was a nice club, but I couldn't get too much into the music.

Nothing going on this weekend, except busting ass on a few Porn Flowers and getting busy for that. Redid my business plan for 2008 so I'm super focused and excited! *bunny clap*

"Benevolent Rebel"

2007-10-26T05:14:00.000-04:00

What is a "Benevolent Rebel"? I consider myself a benevolent rebel. A benevolent rebel is someone who has good intentions for the common good, but the delivery in everything they do is somewhat naughty and rebellious. Haha, coming from the Gemini herself. For example, with the porn flowers....the end message is a message that serves not only all women but humanity included, but its delivery is rebellious.

I choose to live my life this way. All my life I've had people try to steal my dreams. Telling me I couldn't do this. Or I shouldn't do that. They tried to instill fear in me. Sometimes it worked, other times my hot temper deflated their intent to kill my dreams.

This new ideal of the benevolent rebel for me is true definition of those who are innovators. I adore rebels. Of any kind. Only by being a rebel do you challenge the status quo, and only challenging the status quo do you push for new ground in making room for what you're trying to express.

In the end, benevolent rebels are here to express something, not prove anything. I guess, I realized that in order to be the benevolent rebel that I can possibly be, I have to claim full responsibility for everything and everyone--not just myself anymore, but everyone I associate with, who depends on me.

That was the true lesson of that day. Before I tried to be as responsible as I could be and take initiative for myself only, but today I accepted responsiblity for the success of all those that are on my "team".

That means being fully responsible for what happens to mom and dad.....they are still in China visiting grandma, and dad lost his disability (short recap: my mom and dad have worked hard all their lives and my big dream is to retire them asap because they are both diabetic and dad is losing his motor skills and we don't know what's wrong with him). Being fully responsible for my financial services agents that are associated with me (I am building a business in financial services). Taking full responsibility for my clients.

All in all, today I learned the lesson of taking serious responsibility for everyone I associate with.....my family, my friends, associates, business partners, etc. It's about everyone else now.

Everyone depends on me. Which means I have to come through in my delivery. It must be great, it must be amazing and fantastic, and most of all, it has to make all those folks proud.

But most of all, I must impress myself with it. The feeling of truly impressing yourself and doing something that you never thought you could do is the second best feeling besides love. It's a kind of feeling that makes you cry with amazement.

I must work for that feeling again. For the next big BOOM.

An EXPLOSION is coming. GET READY.

Crazy man knocks on my door last night at 3:30 am!

2007-10-03T20:44:00.000-04:00

So last night was one of my fascinating all nighters. I don't exactly like pulling them, but when I get sucked into something, I don't let go until I'm really finished with it, or unless I get it. So this blog thing had my attention, hehe.

My light was on, I was getting tired, then I heard a knock. And I ignored it. I figured it was someone knocking on the wrong door. Then I heard it again and again for a little while longer. And whatever it was, it was really close, right on the other side of the door.

So I went to look through the peephole. And of course the peephole was built for someone 5'8" or over (well, when you're 5'2" and not growing, everyone looks the same from that point of view). So I went underneath my bed and grabbed my hammer, got a chair, and looked through the peep hole (I knew I shouldn't have sold my 9mm Glock!)

I yelled, "Who is it?" in a really loud voice. "What do you want?" Some young looking dude in a white tshirt says, "I'm Ulysses, I saw you painting from the window when I walk by...."
I was so pissed off. If he was going to holla, couldn't he leave some flowers by the door with a phone number or something? At 3:30 fucking am in the morning? Did he think I was going to let him in? Whaa?

I yelled, "It's fucking 3:30am in the morning! Get the fuck away! Get the fuck away right now or I'm going to call the fucking cops! Back off!"

Hey, it's what they teach you in self defense. Hell no I wasn't going to let him in. lmao!

Pics from Solo at Bert Green Fine Art (Los Angeles)

2007-10-03T10:17:00.001-04:00

w/ Bert Green at the opening. I can not say enough about this guy. I walked into his gallery a few years ago in the middle of an opening right when I moved here from Atlanta and not sure what came over me but I totally "solicited" him and showed him some images and somehow I had an appointment next week. Wow that is definitely what you're not supposed to do. Don't do that. No seriously, don't.

What I love about Bert is his sincere honesty and always coming from a place of love. He comes from a place of having your best interest in mind. Over the years, you learn about someone through their actions and consistency. Furthermore, I admire Bert for being on the same plane as myself in coming from a place of love, abundance, and spirit; and not from a place of fear, ego, or scarcity. Much love to Bert!

David Meanix does these bad-ass photo sculptures. They look real, in a surreal way. I'm gonna miss him, he headed to NYC to break new ground shortly after the opening. I'll see you in NYC David! We're gonna have wasabi eating contests ok?!!

Suzi Moon and Steve gave me flowers. Beautiful.

My dress kept sliding off! It was hot but I was happy with my beer hanging out with my friend Melody and Michael Rabbit.

One of my best best friends Lesley Reed in the foreground. I don't know who those two Asian dudes are in the background, but I am SO HAPPY you came! Right on! Thanks for coming out and supporting female Asian chic artists that make art out of porn! I know it's quite different for us...Asians. Hee hee.

Kisses from Suzi!

w/ Cali Rossen

Right on, I feel great about what I'm doing. 2008 is going to be a kick ass year with lots of great things in store. I was so busy getting things together for my solo here in LA that I couldn't make it out for my first show in NY that opened at Zone: Chelsea Center for the Arts.

Here are a few pics from my solo at Bert Green Fine Art: We had a badass turnout! I was happy. It was hot as fuck, but I was glistening and happy. Special thanks to Bert Green, one of the big-hearted gallerists I've ever worked with, words cannot say enough how much his support has meant to me.

Fun photos throughout the years....

2007-10-03T06:39:00.001-04:00

W/ curator, critic, and mentor Koan-Jeff Baysa. 2007

Koan and I met through this show he curated called "Red Beans and Rice: Asian Artists in the New South". He's been an amazing mentor. I'm so grateful to have his support and he is an integral part of the bunny team!

In Vegas, 2007

w/ Laura Clemons, Gallery Director of the Lowe Gallery
This girl inspires me so much. She keeps me accountable, consults me on my art, and I even have her listed as my emergency contact. She knows her art. And she definitely knows what she's doing. And I love having pajama parties at her place watching Tivo.

I met Bora on Craigslist. He's my first Turkish friend. And in the middle is his girlfriend Analia, who's also an artist and fashion designer from Argentina. I'd never met Turkish folks before until I moved out to LA, and I love anything Turkish! Turkish men, turkish food, and turkish...ahum, tea.

Inspiration for porn flowers. "Girls of Paradise"

TindelMichi (Two Fat Southern Boys that Paint) and I in their hotel room during Art Basel Miami 2006. Man that was fun! Scooters and all!

Laura and Kahrin sitting pretty on Laura's birthday in Jamaica!

Jamaica 2006

YS Falls, Jamaica 2006

Jamaica 2006

Jamaica, summer 2006!

Fooling around with my camera, 2006

"Hee hee"

Collector Tracy Y. This woman is awesome. She just is. Beyond words. 2004

Collector Paula S.
Weird how fate works. We had met like three times before we knew it was destined to be true! She and Andrew had to own a Yun Bai original! They're so fun. They definitely know how to groove. And dress up in rockin' costumes. 2004

Me and Kahrin kickin' it in the ATL, summer 2004

I loved the seals in SF. 2004

This girl is a trip. She had never met me but put me up at her place for a week in San Fran just cuz our mutual friend said I was cool.

This girl is my role model. I totally want to be a Suicide Girl like her. (Me: "Do I have to show my boobies in the pictures?" Her: "Yes Yun, you gotta show your boobies". Yun: "Damn. Too bad those days are over". lol

The nude beach baby! It's the reason I moved to California!

I had this moment of laying on the nude beach (no tan lines!), and a pina colada slurpee with a lot of rum in it, and that's when I realized my soul belonged by the beach...

This girl is the reason why I adore Libras. We met during printmaking class in college. She let me stay with her over winter break cuz I didn't want to go home, and I ate all her food and she still loves me til this day. I was a hungry growling panda...she knew to stay clear from the hungry panda, and instead let the growling hungry panda ravish through the ritz crackers and the peanut butter and jelly and the cocoa puffs........steer clear, the hungry panda will rip through your kitchen when she's on a mission for food!

I was feeling sultry that day. 2003?

Looking cute, getting ready for a wedding, 2003. I knew these girls from Atlanta, when they attended the Atlanta College of Art. Even though I went to Agnes Scott, a women's college, I met them through a mutual friend and they introduced me to a lot of the kids at their school. I was roomies with Lesley (far right) and she has some crazy roomie stories on me!

I've known these girls since 1998. Lesley and Chrissy have been there through it all.

2003

24th birthday, 2003
w/ Heather Stewart of Soho Myriad, Atlanta

At a party...

Whoo hoo!

2007-10-03T06:11:00.000-04:00

That was super exciting. I'm super excited about my new blog. I like it that blogs are for nerds or the weirdly quirky types that we know deep down we are. If there was a flag for nerds, we would have it sewn on our clothes or maybe even tattooed on us. So this is what Doogie Howser felt like.....I could see how this shit can get addictive.